They say the best artists, writers, poets have been a bit weird. Sick, if you want. I can completely understand that. I'm sick at the moment (some would say all the time, but we don't care about them, do we...), filling myself with all kinds of fruit, tea, drugs (not those drugs). Obviously my body's experiencing a bit of a shock. Used to drinking beer, my brain strangely suggested I should go behind the computer and write dumb stuff!
As we can't fight the organ, which should make us look smarter in other people's eyes (but that is not always the case, is it?), it was time to think about stupid things. As I was torturing my brain alphabetically, it wasn't long before I got the idea. Anagrams.
Oh, what a cool thing to do with a sick body and mind! As I'm a huge football fan, I chose to do some footballers playing in the Premier League. As you can see below, I chose two players of each team (well, if there was an obvious one, I put in the third also).
I added some punctuation marks to, well, emphasize the effect. Honestly, it didn't always work. But there are still couple of anagrams that should put a smile on your face! Or was it just me with my sick mind? Whatever.
You can see a stunning Florent Malouda's DNA, Seamus Coleman is dirty - as is Dimitar Berbatov, Stewart Downing has a weird hobby, Ryan Shawcross is a huge (too huge?) fan of Rory McIlroy. Danny Welbeck knows a Washington secret, Simeon Jackson is rather appalled by Jose Mourinho's sex life.
Leon Britton has a betting advice for LaDainian Tomlinson, Clint Dempsey shows no respect for Bond's M, Peter Odemwingie's winter-transfer experience has left huge consequences, Ronnie Stam gets a halftime instructions, how to stop Marko Marin, and many, many more.
ARSENAL
Abou Diaby - Baby Audio.
Bacary Sagna - Canary ab gas.
ASTON VILLA
Andreas Weimann - Rea was in men-DNA.
Marc Albrighton - Bring Colmar hat.
CHELSEA
Yossi Benayoun - Ben sins, you say...
Florent Malouda - A lot for mule-DNA...
EVERTON
Kevin Mirallas - Nivea kills RAM.
Seamus Coleman - Cum-meal season.
FULHAM
Damien Duff - Dead muffin.
Dimitar Berbatov - A morbid-vibe tart.
LIVERPOOL
Daniel Sturridge - Ill turd greandes.
Stewart Downing - Owning wet darts.
MANCHESTER CITY
David Silva - Vail vids ad.
Gareth Barry - Grab E.T., Harry!
MANCHESTER UNITED
Danny Welbeck - Kenyan blew D.C.
Anders Lindegaard - Dan is radar legend.
NEWCASTLE UNITED
Gabriel Obertan - Boring bee altar.
Shola Ameobi - O, Amish ebola.
NORWICH CITY
Andrew Surman - Damn raw nurse!
Simeon Jackson - Man on Jose - sick!
QPR
Esteban Granero - Tease N.N., Roger!
Fabio - Fobia.
Stephan M'bia - I hate PMS, Bean!
READING
Adam Le Fondre - One rad mad elf.
Ian Harte - Anti-hare!
SOUTHAMPTON
Steven Davis - Ass-event vid.
Rickie Lambert - Tickier Mr. Bale.
STOKE CITY
Wilson Palacios - CIA won a pill. SOS!
Ryan Shawcross - Can Rory show ass?
SUNDERLAND
Wes Brown - Owns brew.
Danny Graham - Ah, mad granny.
Titus Bramble - Berta's bum lit.
SWANSEA
Wayne Routledge - A needy lower gut.
Leon Britton - Bet on noir, L.T.!
TOTTENHAM
Clint Dempsey - Sip decently, M!
Kyle Naughton - Naughty on elk.
WBA
Peter Odemwingie - RT O, I'm peeing weed!
Marc-Antoine Fortune - Matureen' coon fartin'...
WEST HAM
Winston Reid - No twin rides!
Mohamed Diame - Home died, mama...
WIGAN
Franco Di Santo - Foot in narcs ad.
Maynor Figueroa - Oi! Re-fag your man!
Ronnie Stam - Stone Marin!
Showing posts with label arsenal. Show all posts
Showing posts with label arsenal. Show all posts
2012-04-21
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 35th ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
The opening match of the 35th round was a London derby. Everybody expected a cracker - but got a snore-fest. Ok, the footballers of a club, which got its name by putting -nal to a, well, backside, hit the post/bar twice, but otherwise it was as boring as baseball. Or cricket, if you want. No wonder then that a season-high number of fans at the Emirates were... quiet. However, it is possible they had missed Didi Drogba, who was left out due to olympic campaign. Some say, he really likes jumping in the pools of water. In acrobatic fashion.
Much more exciting was at the St. James' Park, as the NUFC's stadium will be (again and rightly so) called on "no-sponsors-names-allowed" Tuesdays and Wednesdays in the next season. The Magpies got another three points and are serious contenders for one of the Champions League spots. Yes, Papiss Demba Cisse scored again.
As did Wazza (literally in the theater, it was as quiet as the Emirates!). He's now in the top 4 of United's all time scoring list. And just a goal behind Robin van Persie in the battle of EPL "capocannoniere". Who has an abstinence crisis of some sort. He was told to go back to what he was smoking before... Anyway, despite the goals by the hair-plugs, the Red Devils didn't win versus the blues from Liverpool. In addition, the blues from Manchester beat the Wolves from Falklands. This means that the Manchester derby next Monday will probably decide this year's champion.
In other 35th round matches, waving middle fingers is obviously a common way to greet Alex McLeish, a Canadian rescues Blackburn from the crapper, Philippe Senderos scored (no, really!), Liverpool - WBA game is like a delayed ejaculation, and more. Must see: why would Tottenham's big-eared star Gareth Bale fit in Barca's squad perfectly? A hint: it has nothing to do with the testis as there is a shortage of them in the lilywhites' shorts.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "35th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 35th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
ARSENAL - CHELSEA 0-0
@YouAreMyArsenal
Didier Drogba has been rulled out of the Emirates clash v #Arsenal. He has Olympic diving trials with Bale & Young.
@MountainWAG
Malouda has a haircut that screams, "I passed out at a Sublime show & woke up like this." Even #afc players are astounded. #hairfail
@TheGinge87
'Always a threat John Terry'. Yeah he is when your wife is around. #cfc #afc
@bluechampion
Mike Dean is a kind referee. He listens to Arsenal players before he makes his decisions. #afc #cfc
@JeParleGeordais
Emirates, world's most expensive library #afc #cfc #noatmosphere
@BobbyDigital45
Gervinho: wtf are u about? Do u actually know how to play football? And why did u fool Wenger with that brazilian name when u from IC! #AFC
ASTON VILLA - SUNDERLAND 0-0
@danwalkerbbc
Villa have had 350 corners in the PL since last scoring from 1! (James Collins, Nov 2010 v Blackpool) #DullButFascinating #stat #AVFC
@molotov_bomb
Heskey on :( You literally might as well bring on a cat. #avfc
@EdFitter
McLeish went over to fans, 2 men learned over to him and waved their middle fingers in anger at him, he looked destroyed. Ouch.. #avfc
BLACKBURN - NORWICH CITY 2-0 (1-0)
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! Blackburn 2-0 Norwich - Hoilett pulls Rovers out the toilett?
@joshboswellbrfc
Mauro Formica is a recession Kaka.
BOLTON - SWANSEA 1-1 (1-1)
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! Bolton 1-1 Swansea - Eagles gets home side flying again
FULHAM - WIGAN 2-1 (0-0)/
@FulhamFC
So Martin Jol makes two changes from the Chelsea match, Kelly and Frei are replaced by Senderos and the returning Pogrebnyak #FFC
@DaviDiggz
Pogrebnyak proving to be a good bargain for Fulhan FC with his ongoing love affair for the opposing sides netting.
@richardosman
Phillipe Senderos has scored? You're kidding? My auto-correct will only accept 'Phillipe Senderos hasn't scored'. #COYW
NEWCASTLE UTD - STOKE CITY 3-0 (2-0)
@OptaJoe
11 - Papiss Demba Cisse has equalled Mick Quinn's Premier League record of most goals in his first 10 games (11). Unstoppable.
@atoonlad
Incentive for #NUFC to reach the CL, UEFA don't allow sponsored stadiums so all home games will be at St. James' Park”
@jozxyqk76
Having a Guinness in honour of the amazing black & whites #nufc
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - TOTTENHAM 1-0 (1-0)
@paddypower
And #THFC's Gareth Bale is quite a player- but imagine what he'll be like when he evolves...
@FRfootballLiam
#Taarabt scores a free kick. "Put that in your pipe and smoke it Harry!" You can almost hear him say. #QPR 1-0 #THFC
@Mo_Diame21
Bale looks like a #Barca player.............not capable of scoring in West London #QPR #thfc
@mktuam
#Spurs need Testicular Fortitude...anyone know who he plays for? #COYS #THFC
MANCHESTER UTD - EVERTON 4-4 (1-1)
@georgiebingham
Er - is Rooney attempting a Roy Keane/James from Geordie Shore Combover? Noooooooo. We get it! The hair transplant worked! #MUFC
Ashwin Venkat @avenkat10
@PGrealey
Pienaar has changed the message on his vest to JELAVIC IS GREAT!!
@SamWallaceIndy
MU all-time goalscorers: Charlton 758 apps/249 gls; Law 404/237; Rowley 424/211; Rooney 362/180. Rooney's goal to game ratio is very good
@eugineprince
Now Rooney is just a goal behind RVP. The Dutchman shud go back to what he was smoking
@NileshP7
The only positive was Rooney & Welbeck doing a nice impression of Yorke and Cole. Unfortunately our back 4 did an impression of Wolves, ffs.
LIVERPOOL - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 0-1 (0-0)
@chrislepkowski
Odemwingie goal is Albion's first at Anfield since November 1985. That's also the last time #wba scored in open play vs LFC
@liverpooldeep
LFC remind me a bit of when you're playing 2 player on FIFA and the other person leaves the room, you unpause, and you still can't score.
@kitster29LFC
This game is the football equivalent to delayed ejaculation. Everytime we hit the vinegar strokes, we start thinking about tax returns. #LFC
WOLVERHAMPTON - MANCHESTER CITY 0-2 (0-1)
@spider76efc
Just learnt that etihad translates into English as unity, so you could say in a way that man city play at the united stadium
@UnitedsRedArmy
And the commentator said "those supporting Man City have pessimism in their DNA" no mate it's called wankerism #UNITED
@joshuaax1234
Love how wolves are relegated and can hear them singing and man city are nearly winning the league and can hear a thing. Wish I was there.
@FourFourTom
Wolves fans to Tevez and Aguero: "The Falklands are ours, the Falklands are ours, f*ck off you Argies, the Falklands are ours!" - genius.
2012-04-12
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 32nd AND 33 rd ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
Easter holidays. Plenty of food, plenty of football. That's why this is a "double". After these two rounds of EPL it is pretty much clear that MUFC's 20th title is just seconds of downloading away.
Or is it? What the red ones showed against Wigan was not exactly champions' performance. Tottenham disappointed, too. In fact they were so poor, that the fans took the opportunity and did a fire-drill. Of some sort.
Anyhow, there were a lot of good tweets this week, so I will not bother you anymore. Scroll down and you might get a tear or two in the eye... A little teaser: even Andy Carroll and Ron Jeremy are down there. In the same tweet!
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "32nd/33rd edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 32nd and 33rd round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
32nd round
SWANSEA CITY - NEWCASTLE UTD 0-2 (0-1)
@OptaJoe
66 - Papiss Demba Cisse has the best current minutes/goal ratio in Premier League history. Hotshot.
@MirrorFootball
All we are saying, is don't give Papiss a chance...
@waggo8
What do Papiss Cisse and Andy Carroll have in common?Nothing @itsyourboyadey
@ryantcb
Swansea game was like the Indiana Jones Scene where this swordsman does all the fancy sword swinging and Jones just shoots him
SUNDERLAND - TOTTENHAM 0-0
@scjessey
The game is so narrow, it's like watching it being played in a hallway. Players keep bumping into each other. #COYS #THFC #Spurs
@IRCFootball
Super Brad Friedel hasnt missed a premier league game since 15th May 2004, 298 games. Someone in our chatroom said, he needs a life. #thfc
BOLTON - FULHAM 0-3 (0-2)
@OptaJoe
5 - Clint Dempsey has now netted five goals in the last three games against Bolton Wanderers. Threat.
@TheLiamC
Dear any deity who may hear and care, give #FFC a win tomorrow and I will abstain from self-love for a month...
CHELSEA - WIGAN 2-1 (0-0)
@chelseafc
Chelsea fans singing about a pigeon in the ground.........pretty much sums up the first half. #CFC (SL)
@SharonFT9
we robbed Wigan yesterday and it felt good. ;p
LIVERPOOL - ASTON VILLA 1-1 (0-1)
@craig_holdenLFC
I wonder if #lfc ticket prices go down next season? Anyone who says the money we pay is worth watching that calibre of "football" is a liar.
NORWICH CITY - EVERTON 2-2 (1-1)
@philmcnulty
Watched Nikica Jelavic for Rangers & doubted whether he would do it in the Premier League - another one I called correctly.
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - BLACKBURN 3-0 (1-0)
@FourFourTom
Let's play the "make a sentence from the West Brom v Blackburn squads" game. "Long Cox Orr Modeste, Kean Goodwillie". I think I win.
STOKE CITY - WOLVERHAMPTON 2-1 (1-1)
@M_arioBalotelli
Latest possession stats: Stoke - 5%, Wolves - 5%, Ball needlessly pumped into the air by Stoke - 90%.
MANCHESTER UTD - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 2-0 (1-0)
@mufcfans
Loading 20th Title: ██████████████████_] 90% Complete | #MUFC
ARSENAL - MANCHESTER CITY 1-0 (0-0)
@mufcfans
Who said Wenger doesn't deliver trophies? #MUFC #AFC
33rd round
EVERTON - SUNDERLAND 4-0 (0-0)
@danwalkerbbc
17 out of 10 for Pienaar today. The footballing equivalent of @bubbawatson's hook of doom at Augusta #EFC
NEWCASTLE UTD - BOLTON 2-0 (0-0)
@JackWilshere
Shock Cisse scored! #player
@anthlowther
My dad calls pappis cisse "a snipers nightmare". Coz his head is so small.
TOTTENHAM - NORWICH CITY 1-2 (1-1)
@henrywinter
#ncfc fans noting a few #thfc fans leaving start singing: 'Is there a fire drill?" 1-2 88
ASTON VILLA - STOKE CITY 1-1 (1-0)
@MirrorFootball
This is Stoke's 51st game of the season. not including the World Cup in New Zealand
FULHAM - CHELSEA 1-1 (0-1)
@John_KKK_Terry
Chelsea FC will no longer play any games on January 31st, due to the tragic signing of Fernando Torres. The memory is just too painful.
BLACKBURN - LIVERPOOL 2-3 (1-2)
@rogbennett
Crazy game. Can you think of 4 more unexpected words than "Match Winner Andy Carroll." "Ron Jeremy For President" perhaps?
MANCHESTER CITY - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 4-0 (1-0)
@NotTheRealLJK
Dreamt I lived with Aguero and I'd been teaching him Manc slang. He said "Cheers Love" when his missus handed him a drink.
WIGAN - MANCHESTER UTD 1-0 (0-0)
@paddypower
#MUFC: after a disappointing night, sir Alex confirms Phil Dowd will be dropped to the bench for the next match. Makes sense #taxi
@henrywinter
#wafc 1 #mufc 0. Deserved. Wigan sharper, more defiant. Scorer Maloney man of match. At ft, DJ played 'The Great Escape' & 'I'm a Believer"
WOLVERHAMPTON - ARSENAL 0-3 (0-2)
@Arsenes_Eyes
"Hi Harry? Arsene here. I've just found a Gap in Wolverhampton. Is it yours? I heard that you lost one recently" #Arsenal #AFC
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - SWANSEA CITY 3-0 (1-0)
@KeithCostigan
QPR fans chanting "it's like watching paint dry" to Swansea fans.
@Betfairpoker
When Joey Barton scored that goal, he did the worst ever goal celebration: forming a hashtag with his hands.
Or is it? What the red ones showed against Wigan was not exactly champions' performance. Tottenham disappointed, too. In fact they were so poor, that the fans took the opportunity and did a fire-drill. Of some sort.
Anyhow, there were a lot of good tweets this week, so I will not bother you anymore. Scroll down and you might get a tear or two in the eye... A little teaser: even Andy Carroll and Ron Jeremy are down there. In the same tweet!
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "32nd/33rd edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 32nd and 33rd round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
32nd round
SWANSEA CITY - NEWCASTLE UTD 0-2 (0-1)
@OptaJoe
66 - Papiss Demba Cisse has the best current minutes/goal ratio in Premier League history. Hotshot.
@MirrorFootball
All we are saying, is don't give Papiss a chance...
@waggo8
What do Papiss Cisse and Andy Carroll have in common?Nothing @itsyourboyadey
@ryantcb
Swansea game was like the Indiana Jones Scene where this swordsman does all the fancy sword swinging and Jones just shoots him
SUNDERLAND - TOTTENHAM 0-0
@scjessey
The game is so narrow, it's like watching it being played in a hallway. Players keep bumping into each other. #COYS #THFC #Spurs
@IRCFootball
Super Brad Friedel hasnt missed a premier league game since 15th May 2004, 298 games. Someone in our chatroom said, he needs a life. #thfc
BOLTON - FULHAM 0-3 (0-2)
@OptaJoe
5 - Clint Dempsey has now netted five goals in the last three games against Bolton Wanderers. Threat.
@TheLiamC
Dear any deity who may hear and care, give #FFC a win tomorrow and I will abstain from self-love for a month...
CHELSEA - WIGAN 2-1 (0-0)
@chelseafc
Chelsea fans singing about a pigeon in the ground.........pretty much sums up the first half. #CFC (SL)
@SharonFT9
we robbed Wigan yesterday and it felt good. ;p
LIVERPOOL - ASTON VILLA 1-1 (0-1)
@craig_holdenLFC
I wonder if #lfc ticket prices go down next season? Anyone who says the money we pay is worth watching that calibre of "football" is a liar.
NORWICH CITY - EVERTON 2-2 (1-1)
@philmcnulty
Watched Nikica Jelavic for Rangers & doubted whether he would do it in the Premier League - another one I called correctly.
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - BLACKBURN 3-0 (1-0)
@FourFourTom
Let's play the "make a sentence from the West Brom v Blackburn squads" game. "Long Cox Orr Modeste, Kean Goodwillie". I think I win.
STOKE CITY - WOLVERHAMPTON 2-1 (1-1)
@M_arioBalotelli
Latest possession stats: Stoke - 5%, Wolves - 5%, Ball needlessly pumped into the air by Stoke - 90%.
MANCHESTER UTD - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 2-0 (1-0)
@mufcfans
Loading 20th Title: ██████████████████_] 90% Complete | #MUFC
ARSENAL - MANCHESTER CITY 1-0 (0-0)
@mufcfans
Who said Wenger doesn't deliver trophies? #MUFC #AFC
33rd round
EVERTON - SUNDERLAND 4-0 (0-0)
@danwalkerbbc
17 out of 10 for Pienaar today. The footballing equivalent of @bubbawatson's hook of doom at Augusta #EFC
NEWCASTLE UTD - BOLTON 2-0 (0-0)
@JackWilshere
Shock Cisse scored! #player
@anthlowther
My dad calls pappis cisse "a snipers nightmare". Coz his head is so small.
TOTTENHAM - NORWICH CITY 1-2 (1-1)
@henrywinter
#ncfc fans noting a few #thfc fans leaving start singing: 'Is there a fire drill?" 1-2 88
ASTON VILLA - STOKE CITY 1-1 (1-0)
@MirrorFootball
This is Stoke's 51st game of the season. not including the World Cup in New Zealand
FULHAM - CHELSEA 1-1 (0-1)
@John_KKK_Terry
Chelsea FC will no longer play any games on January 31st, due to the tragic signing of Fernando Torres. The memory is just too painful.
BLACKBURN - LIVERPOOL 2-3 (1-2)
@rogbennett
Crazy game. Can you think of 4 more unexpected words than "Match Winner Andy Carroll." "Ron Jeremy For President" perhaps?
MANCHESTER CITY - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 4-0 (1-0)
@NotTheRealLJK
Dreamt I lived with Aguero and I'd been teaching him Manc slang. He said "Cheers Love" when his missus handed him a drink.
WIGAN - MANCHESTER UTD 1-0 (0-0)
@paddypower
#MUFC: after a disappointing night, sir Alex confirms Phil Dowd will be dropped to the bench for the next match. Makes sense #taxi
@henrywinter
#wafc 1 #mufc 0. Deserved. Wigan sharper, more defiant. Scorer Maloney man of match. At ft, DJ played 'The Great Escape' & 'I'm a Believer"
WOLVERHAMPTON - ARSENAL 0-3 (0-2)
@Arsenes_Eyes
"Hi Harry? Arsene here. I've just found a Gap in Wolverhampton. Is it yours? I heard that you lost one recently" #Arsenal #AFC
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - SWANSEA CITY 3-0 (1-0)
@KeithCostigan
QPR fans chanting "it's like watching paint dry" to Swansea fans.
@Betfairpoker
When Joey Barton scored that goal, he did the worst ever goal celebration: forming a hashtag with his hands.
2012-03-27
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 30th ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
There aren't (or shouldn't be) a lot of people who would predict a goal of the season being scored by a 6 ft 7 very thin robot-wannabe. But guess what! It happened. A clumsy looking grasshopper lookalike scored a beauty!
And he scored it against the mighty City. Oh, he was happy! As were his teammates... And the whole red part of Manchester. Which saluted another robot. A sophisticated one. Or so they say. What a transformation from a man, who was constantly being sent to not so pleasant places, to a Beckenbauer-ish ball-kicker.
The gunners were also firing the salvos of joy. They easily beat boring Aston Villa. And surely some kind of a miracle happened. After 15 years two Englishmen scored for the Arse. One man team? Scoring record says no.
In other 30th round matches, Stamford Bridge wants meteorite shower, Wigan still haven't beat a "top 6" side, although they won versus King Kenny's ashamed (I think that is why they wear red) boys, Grant Holt has tackling skills like a pig-chasing farmer, Nicklas Bendtner wears a magic mask, the Toon Army supports Brazil, and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "30th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 30th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
CHELSEA - TOTTENHAM 0-0
@liam_twomey
Jose Bosingwa is the Theo Walcott of full-backs: Quick, and... #cfc #thfc
@apeman383
This game needs a goal. Sorry I meant meteorite shower. #thfc #cfc
@sloanjsloan
Friedel looks like he should be repairing the roads with that bright orange kit on #thfc #cfc
ARSENAL - ASTON VILLA 3-0 (2-0)
@footyfinance
Gervinho's head is slowly losing the battle with the octopus trying to devour it. #AFC
@TimothyAbraham
First time two Englishmen have scored in a Premier League game for Arsenal since 1997. #AFC #AVFC
@STATS_Football
Kieran Gibbs becomes the 17th different Arsenal player to score this season, most in the EPL."
BOLTON - BLACKBURN 2-1 (2-0)
@OptaJoe
18 – Bolton have conceded more set piece goals than any other team in the Premier League this season. Statues.. #motd
@MirrorFootball
Blackburn have Wheater intolerance. They're 1-0 down to an emotional Bolton
LIVERPOOL - WIGAN 1-2 (0-1)
@FunnyGooner
Kenny's excuse list: Injuries ☒ Referee ☒ Badluck ☒ Caroll Downing ☒ Tough opponent ☒ Suarez banned ☒ Missus angry ☒ Tight schedule ✔ #LFC
@YayaTory
He cheats, he dives, he hates the Jackson 5, Luis Suarez, Luis Suarez. #lfc #mcfc kkk
@PeterBolton3
Great Wigan Athletic fact: Up to yesterday they had never beaten a "Top 6" team away - And they still haven't!
NORWICH - WOLVERHAMPTON 2-1 (2-1)
@danwalkerbbc
The only problem with Grant Holt is that he tackles like a farmer trying to capture a runaway pig #agricultural #NCFC
@RnRFootball
Two goals and a red card. I think you could probably describe Grant Holt's performance today as all-action. #ncfc
@Jon_Earle95
Everyone saying Holt for England you're right just in the wrong sport, he should be in the national diving and eating team.
SUNDERLAND - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 3-1 (1-0)
@MsiDouglas
Joey Barton making more friends. Warming up as sub, just flashed #SAFC fans a '5-1' sign. Cue boos...
@Martin_O_Neill
Oh and I've told Bendtner he is NOT taking that mask off. EVER.
@davescholes
Is Nic Bendtner wearing that mask because he is injured or because he actually thinks he is a super hero? #supernic
@OptaJean
2 - Both of Djibril Cissé's two career red cards in league football have been for QPR. Fuse.
SWANSEA - EVERTON 0-2 (0-0)
@ShaunEB1327
Evertons top scorer is Baines with............... 4!!! Baines is a defender, so do Everton have any strikers?? :-)
@YourEverton
GOAL! Swansea 0-2 Everton. Nikica Jelavic tucks away from close range after Marouane Fellaini's pass from the right. 75 minutes gone. #COYB
STOKE CITY - MANCHESTER CITY 1-1 (0-0)
@iainmacintosh
Peter Crouch had no right to score that goal. He shouldn't be able to coordinate limbs that long with such precision.
@iainmacintosh
If ever there is danger, he'll be there. If ever you should need him, he'll come running. He is Yaya Toure. He is more machine than man.
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - NEWCASTLE UTD 1-3 (0-3)
@McNallyMirror
Papiss Cisse may not be able to speak English but he knows how to pu the ball in the net.#nufc 1-0 with Cisse's 4th goal since January move.
@ThisIsLiamM
#NUFC - It's like watching Brazil! Passing flowing football (in the sun). @NUFCOfficial #EPL
@Jowse
How is Perch moving so fast with Odemwingie in his pocket? #nufc
@NUFC_Stats
PL this season: Carroll - £11.67m per goal, Torres - £25m per goal, Cisse - £2m per goal, Ba - £0 per goal! #priceless #nufc
@OptaJoe
6 - Papiss Cisse is the joint-quickest Newcastle player in PL history to reach five goals (six games, same as Les Ferdinand). Adapted.
@MirrorFootball
Saw Cisse earlier buying a Louis Vuitton holdall. Papiss got a brand new bag
MANCHESTER UTD - FULHAM 1-0 (1-0)
@Zad189
Last night Ryan Giggs broke the record for most games played at 'one club'. His 903rd game, surpassed Maldini. What a player #CultHero #MUFC
@BD_19_Fact
Wayne Rooney is now 4 goals off Georgie Best's tally for the club, and 5 off becoming the 4th top scorer in #MUFC history #legend
@InfostradaLive
Rooney scores his 8th PL goal vs Fulham and equals PL record of scoring most goal vs Fulham held by Aiyegbeni, Henry, V Nistelrooy, Viduka.
@MirrorFootball
F-T Man United 1-0 Fulham: Look Roo's back on top of the league table!
@FourFourTom
Jonny Evans is a sophisticated footballing robot sent from the future to change the points total of Fantasy Football managers everywhere.
And he scored it against the mighty City. Oh, he was happy! As were his teammates... And the whole red part of Manchester. Which saluted another robot. A sophisticated one. Or so they say. What a transformation from a man, who was constantly being sent to not so pleasant places, to a Beckenbauer-ish ball-kicker.
The gunners were also firing the salvos of joy. They easily beat boring Aston Villa. And surely some kind of a miracle happened. After 15 years two Englishmen scored for the Arse. One man team? Scoring record says no.
In other 30th round matches, Stamford Bridge wants meteorite shower, Wigan still haven't beat a "top 6" side, although they won versus King Kenny's ashamed (I think that is why they wear red) boys, Grant Holt has tackling skills like a pig-chasing farmer, Nicklas Bendtner wears a magic mask, the Toon Army supports Brazil, and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "30th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 30th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
CHELSEA - TOTTENHAM 0-0
@liam_twomey
Jose Bosingwa is the Theo Walcott of full-backs: Quick, and... #cfc #thfc
@apeman383
This game needs a goal. Sorry I meant meteorite shower. #thfc #cfc
@sloanjsloan
Friedel looks like he should be repairing the roads with that bright orange kit on #thfc #cfc
ARSENAL - ASTON VILLA 3-0 (2-0)
@footyfinance
Gervinho's head is slowly losing the battle with the octopus trying to devour it. #AFC
@TimothyAbraham
First time two Englishmen have scored in a Premier League game for Arsenal since 1997. #AFC #AVFC
@STATS_Football
Kieran Gibbs becomes the 17th different Arsenal player to score this season, most in the EPL."
BOLTON - BLACKBURN 2-1 (2-0)
@OptaJoe
18 – Bolton have conceded more set piece goals than any other team in the Premier League this season. Statues.. #motd
@MirrorFootball
Blackburn have Wheater intolerance. They're 1-0 down to an emotional Bolton
LIVERPOOL - WIGAN 1-2 (0-1)
@FunnyGooner
Kenny's excuse list: Injuries ☒ Referee ☒ Badluck ☒ Caroll Downing ☒ Tough opponent ☒ Suarez banned ☒ Missus angry ☒ Tight schedule ✔ #LFC
@YayaTory
He cheats, he dives, he hates the Jackson 5, Luis Suarez, Luis Suarez. #lfc #mcfc kkk
@PeterBolton3
Great Wigan Athletic fact: Up to yesterday they had never beaten a "Top 6" team away - And they still haven't!
NORWICH - WOLVERHAMPTON 2-1 (2-1)
@danwalkerbbc
The only problem with Grant Holt is that he tackles like a farmer trying to capture a runaway pig #agricultural #NCFC
@RnRFootball
Two goals and a red card. I think you could probably describe Grant Holt's performance today as all-action. #ncfc
@Jon_Earle95
Everyone saying Holt for England you're right just in the wrong sport, he should be in the national diving and eating team.
SUNDERLAND - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 3-1 (1-0)
@MsiDouglas
Joey Barton making more friends. Warming up as sub, just flashed #SAFC fans a '5-1' sign. Cue boos...
@Martin_O_Neill
Oh and I've told Bendtner he is NOT taking that mask off. EVER.
@davescholes
Is Nic Bendtner wearing that mask because he is injured or because he actually thinks he is a super hero? #supernic
@OptaJean
2 - Both of Djibril Cissé's two career red cards in league football have been for QPR. Fuse.
SWANSEA - EVERTON 0-2 (0-0)
@ShaunEB1327
Evertons top scorer is Baines with............... 4!!! Baines is a defender, so do Everton have any strikers?? :-)
@YourEverton
GOAL! Swansea 0-2 Everton. Nikica Jelavic tucks away from close range after Marouane Fellaini's pass from the right. 75 minutes gone. #COYB
STOKE CITY - MANCHESTER CITY 1-1 (0-0)
@iainmacintosh
Peter Crouch had no right to score that goal. He shouldn't be able to coordinate limbs that long with such precision.
@iainmacintosh
If ever there is danger, he'll be there. If ever you should need him, he'll come running. He is Yaya Toure. He is more machine than man.
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - NEWCASTLE UTD 1-3 (0-3)
@McNallyMirror
Papiss Cisse may not be able to speak English but he knows how to pu the ball in the net.#nufc 1-0 with Cisse's 4th goal since January move.
@ThisIsLiamM
#NUFC - It's like watching Brazil! Passing flowing football (in the sun). @NUFCOfficial #EPL
@Jowse
How is Perch moving so fast with Odemwingie in his pocket? #nufc
@NUFC_Stats
PL this season: Carroll - £11.67m per goal, Torres - £25m per goal, Cisse - £2m per goal, Ba - £0 per goal! #priceless #nufc
@OptaJoe
6 - Papiss Cisse is the joint-quickest Newcastle player in PL history to reach five goals (six games, same as Les Ferdinand). Adapted.
@MirrorFootball
Saw Cisse earlier buying a Louis Vuitton holdall. Papiss got a brand new bag
MANCHESTER UTD - FULHAM 1-0 (1-0)
@Zad189
Last night Ryan Giggs broke the record for most games played at 'one club'. His 903rd game, surpassed Maldini. What a player #CultHero #MUFC
@BD_19_Fact
Wayne Rooney is now 4 goals off Georgie Best's tally for the club, and 5 off becoming the 4th top scorer in #MUFC history #legend
@InfostradaLive
Rooney scores his 8th PL goal vs Fulham and equals PL record of scoring most goal vs Fulham held by Aiyegbeni, Henry, V Nistelrooy, Viduka.
@MirrorFootball
F-T Man United 1-0 Fulham: Look Roo's back on top of the league table!
@FourFourTom
Jonny Evans is a sophisticated footballing robot sent from the future to change the points total of Fantasy Football managers everywhere.
2012-03-22
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 29th ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
It's been a marathon round. Hard to follow all the action. Almost as hard as to understand what the hell's going on in Carlos Tevez's head. Or in anybody's head involved with Man City.
However, the Argentine trouble's back. And it could be said he returned with a bang. Not that he scored versus Chelsea - but was one of the best performers. 24 minutes were enough to regain much of the lost love from the City's faithful. Comprensible? Yo no lo creo... Or something like that.
Even though City rose from the dead against Chelsea, the top spot is still in the hands of their bitter rivals. The red devils - who were seriously red-faced (so were the Citizens) after shameful display of power (personally I prefer Vulgar display of power) in Europe - wanted to hunt down some wolves.
But later they realized they had to shoot at some poodles. Obviously not everyone of the SAF's hunting squad wanted to be involved in this massacre, but the job was quickly done.
In fact so quickly that David De Gea, Jonny Evans and Rio Ferdinand soon sat down and played charades, while the ginger genius decided to erase the images of helpless doggies by watching Cosmo Kramer, George Costanza, "Mulva" and others doing their stuff in New York.
In other 29th round matches, someone called Sogoodsson buries Pogrebnyak&co., Wigan and WBA make internet history, Yakubu gets himself in the dictionary, Sebastian Coates makes people swear, and more.
P. S. Get well, Fabrice Muamba!
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "29th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 29th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
FULHAM - SWANSEA 0-3 (0-1)
@nialljgorton
At fulham game this afternoon...best song from Swansea fans: 'you're not s. Massey' to lino when he didn't give an offside
@devinpleuler
You pull off the inverted winger and bring on a classical winger, and what does he do? Cut inside. #fulham #frustrating
@johncrossmirror
Murphy on for blood stained Diarra after Fulham club shop complained they were running out of shirts. 0-2 Swansea
@3FiveTwo
#BPL #Fulham 0 #Swansea 3 - Goldy Sogoodson has hit a double against Fulham as they can close the gap on Liverpool.
@OptaJoe
7 - Gylfi Sigurdsson now has five goals and two assists for Swansea in just nine appearances. Gem.
WIGAN - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-1 (1-0)
@MirrorFootball
Wigan fans: in case you're unfamiliar, what you've got now is called a lead. 1-0 to the latics
@KarlreMarks
That Wigan 1-1 West Brom is trending worldwide should make you lose all faith in the system. This is the third most boring fact in history.
WOLVERHAMPTON - MANCHESTER UTD 0-5 (0-3)
@forevruntd
Congrats #Scholes!! He is now 3rd in the list of most appearances for United (689), behind Sir Bobby Charlton & Ryan Giggs. Legends. #mufc
@acrutd
Who's the Jonny evans impersonator with the passing ability of Paul Scholes in central defence? #MUFC
@CardinalPhink
I hare to see innocent animals suffer, gently puts wolves to sleep with a few comforting words #mufc
@liam_tomkins
This is the worst kind of football match to watch. It's like watching two boxers go at it, only one has no arms. #WWFC #MUFC
@R9Game
MUFC cruising..... de gea playing charades with evans and ferdinand back there... scholes in an armchair watching seinfeld...
NECASTLE UTD - NORWICH CITY 1-0 (1-0)
@Billy3Blyth
Cisse only puts them in the top corner #nufc
@BigGrantHolt
If anyone is wondering why I have a shiner, let’s just say I wont forget Mother’s Day next year. #ncfc
BLACKBURN - SUNDERLAND 2-0 (0-0)
@soccerpaedia
#Yakubu (yak;ubu) fat striker, useful for club and useless for country. Currently blackburn's messiah saving them from relegation see Defoe
MANCHESTER CITY - CHELSEA 2-1 (0-0)
@OptaJoe
4 - Despite playing only 24 mins, no player in Man City-Chelsea created more chances than Carlos Tévez. Return
@OptaJoke
155 - Number of days it's taken Carlos Tevez to warm up for his latest Man City appearance. Return.
@roy_keane_Esq
What is it with the Man City fans crying at every game? Is it that they've just realised they're Man City fans?
@MarioBaloteLAD
Me and Yaya are gonna go and take Tevez out for a walk around Manchester now. Was gonna invite Di Matteo but he might let go of the lead
@ArgentinaFW
Noel Gallagher: "Aguero is a team player, he's a great goalscorer, he's got a nice smile, a good haircut, and he's from Argentina."
TOTTENHAM - STOKE CITY 1-1 (0-0)
@JustASpur
He's just as good as Hoddle, he's better than Chris Waddle, his missus is a model, he's Rafael van der Vaart. #COYS
@piersmorgan
Morning @Lord_Sugar - hearing catastrophic reports re your Apprentice ratings last night. A collapse of Spurs-like proportions. Ironically.
@OptaSpurs
68 - In the last three Premier League games, Spurs have had 68 attempts on goal but have scored just two goals. Barren. (via @EPLIndex)
@samuelj29060
Greatest ever Spurs side is below the worst ever Arsenal side. #afc #thfc
EVERTON - ARSENAL 0-1 (0-1)
@tryan874
Open love seeing all these arsenal fans celebrating going above tottenham by one point shows where they as a club
@MickTheGooner
Using the Fernando Torres 'methodology' of goals to transfer fee ratio, Thomas Vermaelen is now worth £125m! #AtLeast! #Arsenal
@kenkeniff85
What's happened to all the arsenal fans that wanted wenger out??
@Orbinho
Arsenal have had 16 different goalscorers this season, the joint-most in the Premier League along with Everton & Man Utd. One-man team?
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - LIVERPOOL 3-2 (0-0)
@F365
The first chance you get to see Coates goal, take it. If you'll excuse us - holy f**king sh*t, that was special. #LFC
@RorySmithTimes
Sebastian Coates. Butter my onions. He must have a foot like a traction engine. #qpr 0-1 #lfc
@D_JACKAL11
Liverpool never Cisse to amaze me! #QPR
@KennyWFDLive
If Serie A rejects Taiwo and Cisse combine to score against you, you have no business thinking you are Champions Lge contenders. #LFC.
ASTON VILLA - BOLTON 1-2 (0-0)
@steviehannon
McLeish wasn't joking when when he said this was a 'transitional' season. We are changing divisions. #avfc
@kamshaheen
Messi misses. Ngog scores. What on earth is going on?! O_o
However, the Argentine trouble's back. And it could be said he returned with a bang. Not that he scored versus Chelsea - but was one of the best performers. 24 minutes were enough to regain much of the lost love from the City's faithful. Comprensible? Yo no lo creo... Or something like that.
Even though City rose from the dead against Chelsea, the top spot is still in the hands of their bitter rivals. The red devils - who were seriously red-faced (so were the Citizens) after shameful display of power (personally I prefer Vulgar display of power) in Europe - wanted to hunt down some wolves.
But later they realized they had to shoot at some poodles. Obviously not everyone of the SAF's hunting squad wanted to be involved in this massacre, but the job was quickly done.
In fact so quickly that David De Gea, Jonny Evans and Rio Ferdinand soon sat down and played charades, while the ginger genius decided to erase the images of helpless doggies by watching Cosmo Kramer, George Costanza, "Mulva" and others doing their stuff in New York.
In other 29th round matches, someone called Sogoodsson buries Pogrebnyak&co., Wigan and WBA make internet history, Yakubu gets himself in the dictionary, Sebastian Coates makes people swear, and more.
P. S. Get well, Fabrice Muamba!
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "29th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 29th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
FULHAM - SWANSEA 0-3 (0-1)
@nialljgorton
At fulham game this afternoon...best song from Swansea fans: 'you're not s. Massey' to lino when he didn't give an offside
@devinpleuler
You pull off the inverted winger and bring on a classical winger, and what does he do? Cut inside. #fulham #frustrating
@johncrossmirror
Murphy on for blood stained Diarra after Fulham club shop complained they were running out of shirts. 0-2 Swansea
@3FiveTwo
#BPL #Fulham 0 #Swansea 3 - Goldy Sogoodson has hit a double against Fulham as they can close the gap on Liverpool.
@OptaJoe
7 - Gylfi Sigurdsson now has five goals and two assists for Swansea in just nine appearances. Gem.
WIGAN - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-1 (1-0)
@MirrorFootball
Wigan fans: in case you're unfamiliar, what you've got now is called a lead. 1-0 to the latics
@KarlreMarks
That Wigan 1-1 West Brom is trending worldwide should make you lose all faith in the system. This is the third most boring fact in history.
WOLVERHAMPTON - MANCHESTER UTD 0-5 (0-3)
@forevruntd
Congrats #Scholes!! He is now 3rd in the list of most appearances for United (689), behind Sir Bobby Charlton & Ryan Giggs. Legends. #mufc
@acrutd
Who's the Jonny evans impersonator with the passing ability of Paul Scholes in central defence? #MUFC
@CardinalPhink
I hare to see innocent animals suffer, gently puts wolves to sleep with a few comforting words #mufc
@liam_tomkins
This is the worst kind of football match to watch. It's like watching two boxers go at it, only one has no arms. #WWFC #MUFC
@R9Game
MUFC cruising..... de gea playing charades with evans and ferdinand back there... scholes in an armchair watching seinfeld...
NECASTLE UTD - NORWICH CITY 1-0 (1-0)
@Billy3Blyth
Cisse only puts them in the top corner #nufc
@BigGrantHolt
If anyone is wondering why I have a shiner, let’s just say I wont forget Mother’s Day next year. #ncfc
BLACKBURN - SUNDERLAND 2-0 (0-0)
@soccerpaedia
#Yakubu (yak;ubu) fat striker, useful for club and useless for country. Currently blackburn's messiah saving them from relegation see Defoe
MANCHESTER CITY - CHELSEA 2-1 (0-0)
@OptaJoe
4 - Despite playing only 24 mins, no player in Man City-Chelsea created more chances than Carlos Tévez. Return
@OptaJoke
155 - Number of days it's taken Carlos Tevez to warm up for his latest Man City appearance. Return.
@roy_keane_Esq
What is it with the Man City fans crying at every game? Is it that they've just realised they're Man City fans?
@MarioBaloteLAD
Me and Yaya are gonna go and take Tevez out for a walk around Manchester now. Was gonna invite Di Matteo but he might let go of the lead
@ArgentinaFW
Noel Gallagher: "Aguero is a team player, he's a great goalscorer, he's got a nice smile, a good haircut, and he's from Argentina."
TOTTENHAM - STOKE CITY 1-1 (0-0)
@JustASpur
He's just as good as Hoddle, he's better than Chris Waddle, his missus is a model, he's Rafael van der Vaart. #COYS
@piersmorgan
Morning @Lord_Sugar - hearing catastrophic reports re your Apprentice ratings last night. A collapse of Spurs-like proportions. Ironically.
@OptaSpurs
68 - In the last three Premier League games, Spurs have had 68 attempts on goal but have scored just two goals. Barren. (via @EPLIndex)
@samuelj29060
Greatest ever Spurs side is below the worst ever Arsenal side. #afc #thfc
EVERTON - ARSENAL 0-1 (0-1)
@tryan874
Open love seeing all these arsenal fans celebrating going above tottenham by one point shows where they as a club
@MickTheGooner
Using the Fernando Torres 'methodology' of goals to transfer fee ratio, Thomas Vermaelen is now worth £125m! #AtLeast! #Arsenal
@kenkeniff85
What's happened to all the arsenal fans that wanted wenger out??
@Orbinho
Arsenal have had 16 different goalscorers this season, the joint-most in the Premier League along with Everton & Man Utd. One-man team?
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - LIVERPOOL 3-2 (0-0)
@F365
The first chance you get to see Coates goal, take it. If you'll excuse us - holy f**king sh*t, that was special. #LFC
@RorySmithTimes
Sebastian Coates. Butter my onions. He must have a foot like a traction engine. #qpr 0-1 #lfc
@D_JACKAL11
Liverpool never Cisse to amaze me! #QPR
@KennyWFDLive
If Serie A rejects Taiwo and Cisse combine to score against you, you have no business thinking you are Champions Lge contenders. #LFC.
ASTON VILLA - BOLTON 1-2 (0-0)
@steviehannon
McLeish wasn't joking when when he said this was a 'transitional' season. We are changing divisions. #avfc
@kamshaheen
Messi misses. Ngog scores. What on earth is going on?! O_o
2012-03-04
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 27th ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
I know there were some great games on Saturday. But this time Sunday's matches got a bit more space here. Firstly, I should mention Fulham's masterstroke - bringing to London Pavel Pogrebnyak. "Pogreb" in my language (and it's quite similar in russian) means "funeral". You make the conclusions. Wolves' fans should come up with them really quick... Otherwise - hat-trick could be a real eye-opener!
Secondly, there was a big Newcastle - Sunderland derby today! It had it all. A lot of yellows, reds, fouls, suspicious refereeing, goals, penalties, missed penalties, and even some in-breeding insults. It ended with a draw, despite the fact Sunderland came in town with Pele in the squad and Demba Ba played with a pigeon-crap on his head.
Thirdly, Tottenham - Manchester United. Battle of the top. The Red Devils started very shyly. Spurs on the other hand wasted too many chances. They were punished just before the break by the "hair-plugs". To put some more salt on already big Tottenham's wounds, Ashley Young rose from the dead. And scored a brace. Maybe it was just too persuade 'Arry to take England job.
In other 27th round matches Liverpool fans enjoy the Elvis Costello show, Aston Villa bores everyone to death, Darren Pratley is a new term for being, well, "shite", a squirrel steals a show from QPR and Everton, one of the tweeps explains, what is really wrong with Chelsea (yes, the players' surnames can be fatal), and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "27th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 27th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
LIVERPOOL - ARSENAL 1-2 (1-1)
@_pauljones_
if lfc get beat today I'm going to the library in town and shouting a verse from Shakespeare in the librarians face
@Sule456
Downing's right foot shares many similarities with my ferrari, the main one being I don't have one #lfc #afc
@paul_brandon
Couldn't we combine a "kick racism out" and "kick cheating out" campaigns into simply a "Kick Suarez out" one? #lfc #cheat
@Aaron_Sharp_
Charlie Adam really does look like Elvis Costello. Elvis Costello now, that is.. not when they were the same age. #LFC #AFC
@Bethany_LFC
Kuyt missed penalty. Kuyt hit the post. Suarez hit the post. Kelly missed open goal. Szczesny world class saves. How did we lose!? #LFC
@MaratRyndin
Carroll didn't even get off the bench until the end. Buying English players is like paying for a Ferrari and getting a Lada! #lfc
@MpumiLembz
"He's skilled, he's Dutch, he scores with his first touch"
BLACKBURN - ASTON VILLA 1-1 (0-1)
@MickVilla82
I think today's team talk was "try remember how houllier asked you to play and do that" #AVFC #VTID #UTV
@adamclarke501
What's this???. Two positive substitutions and neither involves the Mule!?!?. Well, ride me sideways. #AVFC
@ASTVIL123
'We'll bore you to death, we'll bore you to deeaaaatttthhhhh, WE'RE ASTON VILLA, we'll bore you to death.' #avfc What happened at HT Alex?
MANCHESTER CITY - BOLTON 2-0 (1-0)
@InfostradaLive
Mario Balotelli's goal was the 750th to be scored in the #EPL this season #PL #MCFC
@Dre5IVE
#thatawkwardmoment when Balotelli scores and his teammates arent quite sure what to do
@LeoonStancill
Balotelli scored on the 69th minute? Nice number to score on! #BalotelliIsGod
@FourFourTom
FT: Man City 2-0 Bolton. Man City make history by becoming the first Premier League team to win 14/14 of their opening home games.
@TheBoltonWaffle
For a free transfer Darren Pratley does not represent good value for money #bwfc
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - EVERTON 1-1 (1-1)
@DJones_People
A squirrel has been on the pitch at QPR for almost ten minutes. It means he's nearly had as much game time here as Djibril Cisse
@YourEverton
QPR hit the post twice, first through Taraabt and then Buzsaky. Squirrel still on the pitch.
STOKE CITY - NORWICH CITY 1-0 (0-0)
@AngryAnderton
Disappointed by Stoke. 'Fantastic atmos' and 'we're not just a long ball team'? Both incorrect. Shocking game. #scfc #ncfc
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - CHELSEA 1-0 (0-0)
@Stevo_football
So sacking Ancelotti and appointing AVB (£28m) + sacking AVB (£20m) + buying Torres (£50m) = almost £100m. Can they? #chelsea
@FootballFunnys
AVB = Another Vacancy Beckons.
@Kamo_D
What's the Mata with Chelsea? They looked Terryble they keep on Luizing, Cech the score. To be Frank, AVB doesn't have a Kalou!
WIGAN - SWANSEA 0-2 (0-1)
@Rosela
Yes mother playing like Barcelona is exactly what Wigan were trying to do. Just lack the speed, quick thinking and finishing ability.
@ChrisWathan
Harsh. Swans fans sing 'sacked in the morning' to their old idol Martinez. Harsher was some of the Wigan responses. 'I wish' said one gent
NEWCASTLE UTD - SUNDERLAND 1-1 (0-1)
@MissKatieEmma
The sister is the mother, the fatha is the brother, they all shag one another, a mackem family! Howay the lads! #Nufc
@SurrealFootball
Goal! Pele! I mean Bendtner! Newcastle 0-1 Sunderland
@RossWigham
#nufc Chris waddle the wrong man to be lecturing on penalties. He can't even say it properly.
@markbatham
The paint on on Ba's head makes it look like a huge pigeon has shat on him. #nufc #safc
@OptaJoe
7 - No player in Premier League history has scored more goals v Sunderland than Shola Ameobi. Hero.
FULHAM - WOLVERHAMPTON 5-0 (2-0)
@James_Rox
Keano showing his face in the stands at Fulham. Steve... your new job is a couple of miles down the road.
@eaamalyon
Fulham the baldest team in the league? Seeing AJ, Hangeland, Murphy etc celebrating is like a potato convention.
@Simon_Breeze
I would be surprised by Pogrebnyak's start to Fulham, but he scored 8 goals for me on FIFA in one match, so i knew he was good ;)
@AbhinavCJ
Whoa, Paul Pogrebnyak gets his hat-trick as Fulham go 4-0 up. 5 goals in 3 league games so far. I hope Fernando Torres is watching.
TOTTENHAM - MANCHESTER UTD 1-3 (0-1)
@InnaMUFC_Vettel
Today is Sir Alex's game №986 in the league.He surpasses Sir Matt Busby's record. #mufc
@rhiachohan
Spurs' stupid f***ing camera angle is making me feel more hungover than I need to. #mufc #thfc
@RyanERodgers
Michael Carrick is underrated. If he was Spanish, three inches shorter, and had an A at the end of his name he would be praised. #MUFC
@CRonaldoNews
Rooney scores a header for Man United. That hair transplant really has paid for itself hasn't it? #crnews #MUFC
@RossBuchan
Ashley young man of the match? Did nothing first half. It's like old FIFA games, whoever scores the most gets man of the match
@WoolnoughBrian
The way Spurs are defending over last two games, Harry Redknapp should grab that England contract quickly. #THFC
@JamesOlley
#Redknapp on the top four: "Its going to be tight but I'd rather be where we are than Arsenal. I want to finish third." #thfc
@rayz_mufc
BREAKING NEWS : False earthquake alert in London Cause: #Spurs fans took a heavy hit on their way back down to Earth!! #THFC #MUFC
Secondly, there was a big Newcastle - Sunderland derby today! It had it all. A lot of yellows, reds, fouls, suspicious refereeing, goals, penalties, missed penalties, and even some in-breeding insults. It ended with a draw, despite the fact Sunderland came in town with Pele in the squad and Demba Ba played with a pigeon-crap on his head.
Thirdly, Tottenham - Manchester United. Battle of the top. The Red Devils started very shyly. Spurs on the other hand wasted too many chances. They were punished just before the break by the "hair-plugs". To put some more salt on already big Tottenham's wounds, Ashley Young rose from the dead. And scored a brace. Maybe it was just too persuade 'Arry to take England job.
In other 27th round matches Liverpool fans enjoy the Elvis Costello show, Aston Villa bores everyone to death, Darren Pratley is a new term for being, well, "shite", a squirrel steals a show from QPR and Everton, one of the tweeps explains, what is really wrong with Chelsea (yes, the players' surnames can be fatal), and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "27th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 27th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
LIVERPOOL - ARSENAL 1-2 (1-1)
@_pauljones_
if lfc get beat today I'm going to the library in town and shouting a verse from Shakespeare in the librarians face
@Sule456
Downing's right foot shares many similarities with my ferrari, the main one being I don't have one #lfc #afc
@paul_brandon
Couldn't we combine a "kick racism out" and "kick cheating out" campaigns into simply a "Kick Suarez out" one? #lfc #cheat
@Aaron_Sharp_
Charlie Adam really does look like Elvis Costello. Elvis Costello now, that is.. not when they were the same age. #LFC #AFC
@Bethany_LFC
Kuyt missed penalty. Kuyt hit the post. Suarez hit the post. Kelly missed open goal. Szczesny world class saves. How did we lose!? #LFC
@MaratRyndin
Carroll didn't even get off the bench until the end. Buying English players is like paying for a Ferrari and getting a Lada! #lfc
@MpumiLembz
"He's skilled, he's Dutch, he scores with his first touch"
BLACKBURN - ASTON VILLA 1-1 (0-1)
@MickVilla82
I think today's team talk was "try remember how houllier asked you to play and do that" #AVFC #VTID #UTV
@adamclarke501
What's this???. Two positive substitutions and neither involves the Mule!?!?. Well, ride me sideways. #AVFC
@ASTVIL123
'We'll bore you to death, we'll bore you to deeaaaatttthhhhh, WE'RE ASTON VILLA, we'll bore you to death.' #avfc What happened at HT Alex?
MANCHESTER CITY - BOLTON 2-0 (1-0)
@InfostradaLive
Mario Balotelli's goal was the 750th to be scored in the #EPL this season #PL #MCFC
@Dre5IVE
#thatawkwardmoment when Balotelli scores and his teammates arent quite sure what to do
@LeoonStancill
Balotelli scored on the 69th minute? Nice number to score on! #BalotelliIsGod
@FourFourTom
FT: Man City 2-0 Bolton. Man City make history by becoming the first Premier League team to win 14/14 of their opening home games.
@TheBoltonWaffle
For a free transfer Darren Pratley does not represent good value for money #bwfc
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - EVERTON 1-1 (1-1)
@DJones_People
A squirrel has been on the pitch at QPR for almost ten minutes. It means he's nearly had as much game time here as Djibril Cisse
@YourEverton
QPR hit the post twice, first through Taraabt and then Buzsaky. Squirrel still on the pitch.
STOKE CITY - NORWICH CITY 1-0 (0-0)
@AngryAnderton
Disappointed by Stoke. 'Fantastic atmos' and 'we're not just a long ball team'? Both incorrect. Shocking game. #scfc #ncfc
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - CHELSEA 1-0 (0-0)
@Stevo_football
So sacking Ancelotti and appointing AVB (£28m) + sacking AVB (£20m) + buying Torres (£50m) = almost £100m. Can they? #chelsea
@FootballFunnys
AVB = Another Vacancy Beckons.
@Kamo_D
What's the Mata with Chelsea? They looked Terryble they keep on Luizing, Cech the score. To be Frank, AVB doesn't have a Kalou!
WIGAN - SWANSEA 0-2 (0-1)
@Rosela
Yes mother playing like Barcelona is exactly what Wigan were trying to do. Just lack the speed, quick thinking and finishing ability.
@ChrisWathan
Harsh. Swans fans sing 'sacked in the morning' to their old idol Martinez. Harsher was some of the Wigan responses. 'I wish' said one gent
NEWCASTLE UTD - SUNDERLAND 1-1 (0-1)
@MissKatieEmma
The sister is the mother, the fatha is the brother, they all shag one another, a mackem family! Howay the lads! #Nufc
@SurrealFootball
Goal! Pele! I mean Bendtner! Newcastle 0-1 Sunderland
@RossWigham
#nufc Chris waddle the wrong man to be lecturing on penalties. He can't even say it properly.
@markbatham
The paint on on Ba's head makes it look like a huge pigeon has shat on him. #nufc #safc
@OptaJoe
7 - No player in Premier League history has scored more goals v Sunderland than Shola Ameobi. Hero.
FULHAM - WOLVERHAMPTON 5-0 (2-0)
@James_Rox
Keano showing his face in the stands at Fulham. Steve... your new job is a couple of miles down the road.
@eaamalyon
Fulham the baldest team in the league? Seeing AJ, Hangeland, Murphy etc celebrating is like a potato convention.
@Simon_Breeze
I would be surprised by Pogrebnyak's start to Fulham, but he scored 8 goals for me on FIFA in one match, so i knew he was good ;)
@AbhinavCJ
Whoa, Paul Pogrebnyak gets his hat-trick as Fulham go 4-0 up. 5 goals in 3 league games so far. I hope Fernando Torres is watching.
TOTTENHAM - MANCHESTER UTD 1-3 (0-1)
@InnaMUFC_Vettel
Today is Sir Alex's game №986 in the league.He surpasses Sir Matt Busby's record. #mufc
@rhiachohan
Spurs' stupid f***ing camera angle is making me feel more hungover than I need to. #mufc #thfc
@RyanERodgers
Michael Carrick is underrated. If he was Spanish, three inches shorter, and had an A at the end of his name he would be praised. #MUFC
@CRonaldoNews
Rooney scores a header for Man United. That hair transplant really has paid for itself hasn't it? #crnews #MUFC
@RossBuchan
Ashley young man of the match? Did nothing first half. It's like old FIFA games, whoever scores the most gets man of the match
@WoolnoughBrian
The way Spurs are defending over last two games, Harry Redknapp should grab that England contract quickly. #THFC
@JamesOlley
#Redknapp on the top four: "Its going to be tight but I'd rather be where we are than Arsenal. I want to finish third." #thfc
@rayz_mufc
BREAKING NEWS : False earthquake alert in London Cause: #Spurs fans took a heavy hit on their way back down to Earth!! #THFC #MUFC
2012-02-26
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 26th ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
English Premierleague might not be the best in the world regarding football quality. But it is by far the most entertaining! All the sceptics should've watched London derby between Arsenal and Tottenham.
My God, it was all pleasure. For the visitors only in the first 34 minutes I should add. Yes, it had looked like 'Arry would add more misery to the Gunners. But the next English manager blew it up in the 2nd half. With using questionable tactics he kicked himself in the teeth. Hard.
You must've done something wrong if Theo Walcott, who is hated even by the Arse supporters, scored. Twice, for that matter. Even the Bruce "almighty" Willis couldn't save the Spurs. Yes, this time it was all too powerful Yossi Benayoun who used the famous line: "Yipikayey, Martha Focker!"
Now I should mention the Merseyside derby, which was postponed to today - March 13th. Not a good day for David Moyes and his 10th anniversary as Everton's manager. But a really good one for Stevie G - played his 400th PL match in LFC shirt and scored a hat-trick. No wonder some Kop-like fans would tuck him in. With their wives in the same bed, that is.
In other 26th round matches Frank Lampard's milestones go unnoticed (or maybe just the volume button on my telly is broken - no sound whatsoever), Kevin Doyle finds a post-football career, QPR are obviously thinking about joining the NFL (or why would you need 40+ players?), Mario Balotelli reveals a new t-shirt (something about selling your virginity or... well, google it), two dinosaurs, one found in Wales, one in Salford, kill the canaries in their cage, and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "26th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 26th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
LIVERPOOL - EVERTON 3-0 (1-0)
@andybell88
I know Liverpool are a joke, but having Adam Sandler at left back is taking it a bit far. #efc #lfc
@dwagie
Hendo is shaite. I kinda miss Poulsen.. wait, what? #theredmen #LFC
@thesnowdens
Andy Carroll is 6-1 to score today.... If you don't understand betting that means that if you bet £10, you will lose £10. #LFC
@LFCtransfernews
Steven Gerrard set to become 25th player to reach 400 PL appearance milestone and only the fifth to achieve it for one single club. #LFC
@AntHaddley
Said it before but if I came home and found Steven Gerrard in bed with my wife, I would tuck him in. #LFC
@liam_tomkins
Somebody said to me that Steven Gerrard was a shadow of his former self these days. I wish my shadow was that good!
CHELSEA - BOLTON 3-0 (0-0)
@chrismada9
I think I might have to turn the volume up because I can't hear the #Chelsea support *turns up volume* ... okay I still can't hear it! #CFC
@Frimponged
Didier Drogba has scored 99 Premier League goals. Fernando Torres will reach that same amount in the year 2401, at this rate. #cfc
@flyingdutchfan
150th league goal and his 149th Premier League goal. Frank Lampard, legend. #cfc
@BarriesView
9 - with that goal Frank Lampard becomes the first player in Premier League history to score double figures in nine consecutive seasons #CFC
@MiggLovin
When the commentator yells, "TORRES!" he either A. shanked the ball, or B. got an assist. #CFC
NEWCASTLE UTD - WOLVERHAMPTON 2-2 (2-0)
@InfostradaLive
Papiss Cissé was 5th player to score in his first 2 home #PL matches for #NUFC after Shearer, L. Ferdinand, D. Ferguson & Daniel Cordone
@danwalkerbbc
Last time Wolves won away at Newcastle in the top flight was 7th Feb 1959. The day Mick McCarthy was born! #WWFC #NUFC #Stat
@jaredstimson
Kevin Doyle looks like he should be in a rock band, not a striker in the Prem. @
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - FULHAM 0-1 (0-1)
@InfostradaLive
Pavel Pogrebnyak is the 2nd #fulham player in #EPL history to score in each of his first 2 matches for the club after David Healy #PL
@RobertOrdever
There is more #ffc love on my timeline tonight than a whole series on the isle of Fernando #fulhamfamily
@iainmacintosh
Samba Diakite was the 42nd player to be named in a QPR matchday squad this season. They'll need an extension at the training ground soon.
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - SUNDERLAND 4-0 (2-0)
@WDownes
wearing my west brom shirt to core p.e on monday, purely because Mr Pigford supports Sunderland
@Martin_O_Neill
Having a drink in the corner flag in Sunderland. Sess & Frazier have just turned up dressed like Rizzle Kicks. #PartyWithMarty
WIGAN - ASTON VILLA 0-0
@FourFourTom
FT: Wigan 0-0 Aston Villa. Today's glamour tie certainly didn't disappoint. Passes, throw ins and two clean sheets. #TheThrillaVsVilla
@AFraser
Having Alex McLeish as your manager is great. Completely frees up that time you might otherwise spend watching Match of the Day. #avfc
MANCHESTER CITY - BLACKBURN ROVERS 3-0 (1-0)
@FOXSoccerTrax
I'm going to resist the urge to make jokes about Balotelli's t-shirt, but I do urge you to Google "Raffaella Fico." She's a piece of work!
@TomSeymour
Great strikers goal by Dzeko today. Cross from the chalk and the big man leaping like a gazelle. Few better sights in football for my money
@CharleyRoseB
"It's a match ball for Sergio Aguero, but he knows who to thank, the mercurial genius of the man they call the wizard" <3 ARSENAL - TOTTENHAM 5-2 (2-2)
@Okwonga
Brad Friedel is officially the Bruce Willis of football. Bald badass who never disappoints. Bet he can sing too. #thfc #afc
@nosakhari
My Girlfriend #AFC is cheating on me again with my enemy #THFC and she is making me watch her do it.
@NathanITFC
If you get out muscled by Yossi Benayoun you really need to be hitting the gym! #arsenal #thfc
@munsy_uk
Turned TV over now watching Colombo on ITV, much better. #THFC
@GunnersStunners
BREAKING NEWS!! The new #Spurs DVD has been cut short to only 34 mins & is titled as '2-0, A memorable afternoon at the Emirates' #afc #thfc
NORWICH CITY - MANCHESTER UTD 1-2 (0-1)
@SteveRLawrence
Premier League clubs must feel pissed getting beaten with two 36 Year old players #legends #mufc
@rebeccaabbott93
Few things after #ncfc game today 1) There's a reason stoppage time's called Fergie time 2) Where would #mufc be without Scholes and Giggs..
@henrywinter
Giggs, playing 900th #mufc game, is the lord of the landmark: Scored United's 6000th league goal (v Saints 93) & 7000th (v Birmingham 06)
@jaymotty
If u divide Ryan Giggs number of appearances 4 United by 900 then subtract 1 u get the exact number of Steven Gerrard league title medals
STOKE CITY - SWANSEA 2-0 (2-0)
@Pagella1990
Peter Crouch should still be playing for Liverpool and Andy Carrol should be working for #ASDA #LFC
@FOXSoccerTrax
70: Hey something happened at Stok-- oh, wait, it was just a trash bag blowing across the pitch. Carry on. Stoke 2, Swans 0.
841001
"@Stats_official: Stoke 2-0 Swansea: Passes 194-614|Pass% 66-85|Possession 26%-74%" Proof passes are not everything in football.
My God, it was all pleasure. For the visitors only in the first 34 minutes I should add. Yes, it had looked like 'Arry would add more misery to the Gunners. But the next English manager blew it up in the 2nd half. With using questionable tactics he kicked himself in the teeth. Hard.
You must've done something wrong if Theo Walcott, who is hated even by the Arse supporters, scored. Twice, for that matter. Even the Bruce "almighty" Willis couldn't save the Spurs. Yes, this time it was all too powerful Yossi Benayoun who used the famous line: "Yipikayey, Martha Focker!"
Now I should mention the Merseyside derby, which was postponed to today - March 13th. Not a good day for David Moyes and his 10th anniversary as Everton's manager. But a really good one for Stevie G - played his 400th PL match in LFC shirt and scored a hat-trick. No wonder some Kop-like fans would tuck him in. With their wives in the same bed, that is.
In other 26th round matches Frank Lampard's milestones go unnoticed (or maybe just the volume button on my telly is broken - no sound whatsoever), Kevin Doyle finds a post-football career, QPR are obviously thinking about joining the NFL (or why would you need 40+ players?), Mario Balotelli reveals a new t-shirt (something about selling your virginity or... well, google it), two dinosaurs, one found in Wales, one in Salford, kill the canaries in their cage, and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "26th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 26th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
LIVERPOOL - EVERTON 3-0 (1-0)
@andybell88
I know Liverpool are a joke, but having Adam Sandler at left back is taking it a bit far. #efc #lfc
@dwagie
Hendo is shaite. I kinda miss Poulsen.. wait, what? #theredmen #LFC
@thesnowdens
Andy Carroll is 6-1 to score today.... If you don't understand betting that means that if you bet £10, you will lose £10. #LFC
@LFCtransfernews
Steven Gerrard set to become 25th player to reach 400 PL appearance milestone and only the fifth to achieve it for one single club. #LFC
@AntHaddley
Said it before but if I came home and found Steven Gerrard in bed with my wife, I would tuck him in. #LFC
@liam_tomkins
Somebody said to me that Steven Gerrard was a shadow of his former self these days. I wish my shadow was that good!
CHELSEA - BOLTON 3-0 (0-0)
@chrismada9
I think I might have to turn the volume up because I can't hear the #Chelsea support *turns up volume* ... okay I still can't hear it! #CFC
@Frimponged
Didier Drogba has scored 99 Premier League goals. Fernando Torres will reach that same amount in the year 2401, at this rate. #cfc
@flyingdutchfan
150th league goal and his 149th Premier League goal. Frank Lampard, legend. #cfc
@BarriesView
9 - with that goal Frank Lampard becomes the first player in Premier League history to score double figures in nine consecutive seasons #CFC
@MiggLovin
When the commentator yells, "TORRES!" he either A. shanked the ball, or B. got an assist. #CFC
NEWCASTLE UTD - WOLVERHAMPTON 2-2 (2-0)
@InfostradaLive
Papiss Cissé was 5th player to score in his first 2 home #PL matches for #NUFC after Shearer, L. Ferdinand, D. Ferguson & Daniel Cordone
@danwalkerbbc
Last time Wolves won away at Newcastle in the top flight was 7th Feb 1959. The day Mick McCarthy was born! #WWFC #NUFC #Stat
@jaredstimson
Kevin Doyle looks like he should be in a rock band, not a striker in the Prem. @
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - FULHAM 0-1 (0-1)
@InfostradaLive
Pavel Pogrebnyak is the 2nd #fulham player in #EPL history to score in each of his first 2 matches for the club after David Healy #PL
@RobertOrdever
There is more #ffc love on my timeline tonight than a whole series on the isle of Fernando #fulhamfamily
@iainmacintosh
Samba Diakite was the 42nd player to be named in a QPR matchday squad this season. They'll need an extension at the training ground soon.
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - SUNDERLAND 4-0 (2-0)
@WDownes
wearing my west brom shirt to core p.e on monday, purely because Mr Pigford supports Sunderland
@Martin_O_Neill
Having a drink in the corner flag in Sunderland. Sess & Frazier have just turned up dressed like Rizzle Kicks. #PartyWithMarty
WIGAN - ASTON VILLA 0-0
@FourFourTom
FT: Wigan 0-0 Aston Villa. Today's glamour tie certainly didn't disappoint. Passes, throw ins and two clean sheets. #TheThrillaVsVilla
@AFraser
Having Alex McLeish as your manager is great. Completely frees up that time you might otherwise spend watching Match of the Day. #avfc
MANCHESTER CITY - BLACKBURN ROVERS 3-0 (1-0)
@FOXSoccerTrax
I'm going to resist the urge to make jokes about Balotelli's t-shirt, but I do urge you to Google "Raffaella Fico." She's a piece of work!
@TomSeymour
Great strikers goal by Dzeko today. Cross from the chalk and the big man leaping like a gazelle. Few better sights in football for my money
@CharleyRoseB
"It's a match ball for Sergio Aguero, but he knows who to thank, the mercurial genius of the man they call the wizard" <3 ARSENAL - TOTTENHAM 5-2 (2-2)
@Okwonga
Brad Friedel is officially the Bruce Willis of football. Bald badass who never disappoints. Bet he can sing too. #thfc #afc
@nosakhari
My Girlfriend #AFC is cheating on me again with my enemy #THFC and she is making me watch her do it.
@NathanITFC
If you get out muscled by Yossi Benayoun you really need to be hitting the gym! #arsenal #thfc
@munsy_uk
Turned TV over now watching Colombo on ITV, much better. #THFC
@GunnersStunners
BREAKING NEWS!! The new #Spurs DVD has been cut short to only 34 mins & is titled as '2-0, A memorable afternoon at the Emirates' #afc #thfc
NORWICH CITY - MANCHESTER UTD 1-2 (0-1)
@SteveRLawrence
Premier League clubs must feel pissed getting beaten with two 36 Year old players #legends #mufc
@rebeccaabbott93
Few things after #ncfc game today 1) There's a reason stoppage time's called Fergie time 2) Where would #mufc be without Scholes and Giggs..
@henrywinter
Giggs, playing 900th #mufc game, is the lord of the landmark: Scored United's 6000th league goal (v Saints 93) & 7000th (v Birmingham 06)
@jaymotty
If u divide Ryan Giggs number of appearances 4 United by 900 then subtract 1 u get the exact number of Steven Gerrard league title medals
STOKE CITY - SWANSEA 2-0 (2-0)
@Pagella1990
Peter Crouch should still be playing for Liverpool and Andy Carrol should be working for #ASDA #LFC
@FOXSoccerTrax
70: Hey something happened at Stok-- oh, wait, it was just a trash bag blowing across the pitch. Carry on. Stoke 2, Swans 0.
841001
"@Stats_official: Stoke 2-0 Swansea: Passes 194-614|Pass% 66-85|Possession 26%-74%" Proof passes are not everything in football.
2012-02-13
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 25th ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
This version is a bit shorter due to an unexpected extension of a business trip to Montenegro. A lot of snow - a lot of trouble. Even regarding writing the blog.
One thing that must be outlined is the derby of the round. Which was won by Manchester United. Wayne Rooney to be more precise. Scored a brace. But most fans were again more impressed by his hair and even eyelashes.
In other matches Peter Odemwingie and his team-mates caused a sack of a popular bloke, called Mick McCarthy, AVB takes another step towards his sacking, Aaron Ramsey is somewhat apocalyptic, Emmanuel Adebyor likes tickling, and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "25th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 25th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
MANCHESTER UTD - LIVERPOOL 2-1 (0-0)
@ManUtdStuff
Roy Keane: "If I was playing, if Incey was playing, if Sparky was playing: Suarez ends the game wishing he'd shaken hands." #MUFC
@MissEJHarvey
Please have some respect for Wayne Rooney. He is, after all, the worlds only surviving brain donor.
@BernardMannlng
Wayne Rooney turned up for the Grammies last night and was very disappointed. Apparently he misread the invite.
@eddo75
Good weekend for Wayne Rooney. A brace against Liverpool on Saturday and The Granny awards on TV last night
BLACKBURN - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 3-2 (3-0)
@OptaJoe
39% - Yakubu has the best conversion rate of any regular player in the Premier League this season. Attack.
@AnnieEaves
QPR in real trouble. They've bought players not a team. Like when you go to the supermarket, spend a fortune, and realise you've no meals.
BOLTON - WIGAN 1-2 (0-1)
@CptnPyjamaPants
Owen Coyle is 5/1 in the sack race. Tempted.
@SkySportsFraser
Phone rang during Roberto Martinez press conf. Someone shouted "It's the FA!" Roberto said "Tell them I'm not available!"
@OptaJoe
20 – Bolton Wanderers committed the most fouls today, while Wigan have committed the most this season (326). Sinners.
EVERTON - CHELSEA 2-0 (1-0)
@MatthewCSpence1
@jamesaleung Suarez = dickhead! Everton = the boys!! "Neva felt more like singin the blues, when Everton win and Liverpool lose!
@OptaJoe
2 - The last time Everton won two consecutive home league games was May 2011; their wins were against Manchester City & Chelsea. Repeat.
@philmcnulty
Mancini says didn't prepare right & Man City lose at Everton. AVB says more or less same as Chelsea lose. What is it they don't know about?
@tonymunday1
Will AVB be at Chelsea next season? More importantly when will BOSINGWA stop pretending to be a full back?
FULHAM - STOKE CITY 2-1 (2-0)
@OptaJoe
1 - Pavel Pogrebnyak is the first player to score on his Fulham Premier League debut since David Healy in August 2007. Import.
@OptaJoe
20% - Stoke City posted the worst shooting accuracy today and also for the season as a whole (34%). Wayward.
SUNDERLAND - ARSENAL 1-2 (0-0)
@waleedabunada
The last 4 goals Aaron Ramsey scored for Arsenal killed Osama Bin Laden, Muammar Gaddafi, Steve Jobs and Whitney Houston the next day. #afc
@LethalBizzle
Can someone make a Thierry Henry mask & put it on Chamack and send him to NY red bulls? #DENCHENRY
@OptaJoke
503,226 - Number of Arsenal fans who will have unsuitable dreams about Thierry Henry tonight. Va-va-voom.
SWANSEA - NORWICH CITY 2-3 (1-0)
@blowersh
Fantastic to wake up to Swansea 2 The Canaries 3!!! What a terrific season they're having! A good, wholesome blend of Stephen Fry & Delia!!!
@seanreidHSR
Grant Holt and Danny Graham have all scored equal (Holt) and more (Graham) goals then Darren Bent. Guess which one will go to the Euro's?
TOTTENHAM - NEWCASTLE UTD 5-0 (4-0)
@R_o_M
Adebayor is a quality player when he fancies it. Really seems to fancy it at Spurs, doesn't he. 23 games, 10 goals, 11 assists.
@InfostradaLive
Newcastle record their biggest PL defeat since losing 6-0 at Manchester United in January 2008. #spurs #PL
@F365
Spurs players tickling Adebayor after he scored, like he's a playful dog. Lovely. More of this sort of thing please.
WOLVERHAMPTON - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-5 (1-1)
@OptaJoe
8 - Roy Hodgson's 8 PL away wins as West Brom gaffer in one year, match his 3-year tally with Liverpool (1) & Fulham (7). Kinetosis.
@empiremagazine
Sorry to hear that Mick McCarthy's been sacked. Liam Neeson is hot favourite to take over, as he has a good track record with Wolves. #BOOM
ASTON VILLA - MANCHESTER CITY 0-1 (0-0)
@StupidFootball
Aston Villa are going to go defensive against Man City. They're starting Emile Heskey.
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! Aston Villa 0-1 Manchester City - Lescott scores against his boyhood club. Robbie Keane not happy
One thing that must be outlined is the derby of the round. Which was won by Manchester United. Wayne Rooney to be more precise. Scored a brace. But most fans were again more impressed by his hair and even eyelashes.
In other matches Peter Odemwingie and his team-mates caused a sack of a popular bloke, called Mick McCarthy, AVB takes another step towards his sacking, Aaron Ramsey is somewhat apocalyptic, Emmanuel Adebyor likes tickling, and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "25th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 25th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
MANCHESTER UTD - LIVERPOOL 2-1 (0-0)
@ManUtdStuff
Roy Keane: "If I was playing, if Incey was playing, if Sparky was playing: Suarez ends the game wishing he'd shaken hands." #MUFC
@MissEJHarvey
Please have some respect for Wayne Rooney. He is, after all, the worlds only surviving brain donor.
@BernardMannlng
Wayne Rooney turned up for the Grammies last night and was very disappointed. Apparently he misread the invite.
@eddo75
Good weekend for Wayne Rooney. A brace against Liverpool on Saturday and The Granny awards on TV last night
BLACKBURN - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 3-2 (3-0)
@OptaJoe
39% - Yakubu has the best conversion rate of any regular player in the Premier League this season. Attack.
@AnnieEaves
QPR in real trouble. They've bought players not a team. Like when you go to the supermarket, spend a fortune, and realise you've no meals.
BOLTON - WIGAN 1-2 (0-1)
@CptnPyjamaPants
Owen Coyle is 5/1 in the sack race. Tempted.
@SkySportsFraser
Phone rang during Roberto Martinez press conf. Someone shouted "It's the FA!" Roberto said "Tell them I'm not available!"
@OptaJoe
20 – Bolton Wanderers committed the most fouls today, while Wigan have committed the most this season (326). Sinners.
EVERTON - CHELSEA 2-0 (1-0)
@MatthewCSpence1
@jamesaleung Suarez = dickhead! Everton = the boys!! "Neva felt more like singin the blues, when Everton win and Liverpool lose!
@OptaJoe
2 - The last time Everton won two consecutive home league games was May 2011; their wins were against Manchester City & Chelsea. Repeat.
@philmcnulty
Mancini says didn't prepare right & Man City lose at Everton. AVB says more or less same as Chelsea lose. What is it they don't know about?
@tonymunday1
Will AVB be at Chelsea next season? More importantly when will BOSINGWA stop pretending to be a full back?
FULHAM - STOKE CITY 2-1 (2-0)
@OptaJoe
1 - Pavel Pogrebnyak is the first player to score on his Fulham Premier League debut since David Healy in August 2007. Import.
@OptaJoe
20% - Stoke City posted the worst shooting accuracy today and also for the season as a whole (34%). Wayward.
SUNDERLAND - ARSENAL 1-2 (0-0)
@waleedabunada
The last 4 goals Aaron Ramsey scored for Arsenal killed Osama Bin Laden, Muammar Gaddafi, Steve Jobs and Whitney Houston the next day. #afc
@LethalBizzle
Can someone make a Thierry Henry mask & put it on Chamack and send him to NY red bulls? #DENCHENRY
@OptaJoke
503,226 - Number of Arsenal fans who will have unsuitable dreams about Thierry Henry tonight. Va-va-voom.
SWANSEA - NORWICH CITY 2-3 (1-0)
@blowersh
Fantastic to wake up to Swansea 2 The Canaries 3!!! What a terrific season they're having! A good, wholesome blend of Stephen Fry & Delia!!!
@seanreidHSR
Grant Holt and Danny Graham have all scored equal (Holt) and more (Graham) goals then Darren Bent. Guess which one will go to the Euro's?
TOTTENHAM - NEWCASTLE UTD 5-0 (4-0)
@R_o_M
Adebayor is a quality player when he fancies it. Really seems to fancy it at Spurs, doesn't he. 23 games, 10 goals, 11 assists.
@InfostradaLive
Newcastle record their biggest PL defeat since losing 6-0 at Manchester United in January 2008. #spurs #PL
@F365
Spurs players tickling Adebayor after he scored, like he's a playful dog. Lovely. More of this sort of thing please.
WOLVERHAMPTON - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-5 (1-1)
@OptaJoe
8 - Roy Hodgson's 8 PL away wins as West Brom gaffer in one year, match his 3-year tally with Liverpool (1) & Fulham (7). Kinetosis.
@empiremagazine
Sorry to hear that Mick McCarthy's been sacked. Liam Neeson is hot favourite to take over, as he has a good track record with Wolves. #BOOM
ASTON VILLA - MANCHESTER CITY 0-1 (0-0)
@StupidFootball
Aston Villa are going to go defensive against Man City. They're starting Emile Heskey.
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! Aston Villa 0-1 Manchester City - Lescott scores against his boyhood club. Robbie Keane not happy
2012-02-05
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 24th ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
I remember the times when some Arse's fans demanded Arsene Wenger's ass to be kicked out of their beloved club. Oh, wait, that was just four days ago! So, how come couple of days later he's a genius again, a mastermind again, the best in the world again (you got the point)?
Remarkably, the (new) turning point was Blackburn, a multiple European champion, a power-house in recent years, a team that everyone fears! Well, I may be exaggerating a bit... The Gunners really justified the cannon in their logo, scoring seven (three by RPG... I mean the penetrating RVP), being the superior team, but come on! There were only 10 Venky's chickens to fight with. In the 2nd half, that is. I wonder if that French grasshopper will still be glorified after a next week's fixture.
Arsenal will visit the Stadium of Light. Which is unbelievably bright these days. Some say, the Messiah's been around. The others say, the same Messiah made a pact with the devil. Whatever. The point is, Sunderland are brilliant after the Martin O'Neill's appointment. 22 points of a possible 30. They must be doing something right. And the Arsenal match will be a proper test. For both of them: the Tracksuit and the Sleeping-bag.
I should mention the clash between Chelsea and Manchester UTD. Pure drama! Chelski 3-0 up (Juan Mata scored with a beautiful volley), then two penalties - yes, Howard Webb was the referee - for the Red Devils (Wayne Rooney, who now lost his hair at the sides of his head, converted them brilliantly), Chicharito later scored for 3-3. And that's how it finished.
In other 24th round matches Andrew Surman's messing with the fans' bladders, Swans have a serious English fire-power, Manchester City are missing Hyde, Gabriel Obertan, whose teammate Papiss Cisse scored a cracker, is better as interpreter than as footballer, and much more. Liverpool - Tottenham? It was all about a cat, really.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "24th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 24th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
ARSENAL - BLACKBURN 7-1 (3-1)
@ShinobiAFC
Figures, the one decent ref left in the #EPL gets a knock to the head...virtue has no rewards #AFC
@nicogrounds
RVP. When a girl says no... why? He's more penetrative than a Samurai sword #afc
@SamerF89
Bet those people who brought them black bin bags are wearing them over their heads #afc
@Ashfaque_Anees
I'm having chicken biryani for dinner ..venkys chicken biryani slightly black burnt #afc #arsenal
@KWAMMC
I don't respect any team Bendtner can score against. He scored a worldie couple seasons back against....Blackburn. Go figure.
NORWICH CITY - BOLTON 2-0 (0-0)
@CGoreham
I think today was first time I've ever actually touched the match ball at #ncfc when it was booted into stand. A tremendous thrill
@DavidMaidstone
Can't understand the moaners, in 1902 we couldn't even raise 11 shirts and there wasn't a ref. Don't people realise how far we've come #NCFC
@MadMarcT
I swear I wet myself when Andrew Surman scored... That's why the gaffer jumped up so high. I would have drenched him. #NCFC
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - WOLVERHAMPTON 1-2 (1-0)
@FourFourTom
Djibril Cisse has been sent off. Who at QPR thought "yeah, what could possibly go wrong!" when they heard he was available to buy? Hothead.
@OptaJoe
13 - Wolves have now recovered more points from losing positions than any other team in the top flight this season. Grit.
STOKE CITY - SUNDERLAND 0-1 (0-0)
© @NeilTheGeordie
Martin O'Neill has obviously sold his soul to the devil. More Jam than Hartleys. ;) #SAFC #ONeillsOnWheels
@gavalar_5318008
Anyone else think tony pulis is turning into Neil warnock, blaming everything and everything other than himself #delusional #safc #stokecity
@Smudgerjumps
Well done to the lads, 3 good points in very difficult conditions today! Not the snow, Stoke's horrible tactics & playing style #safc
@FourFourTom
22 points from a possible 30 for Martin O'Neill since taking over at Sunderland. Unbelievable record.
@Martin_O_Neill
Marty's fact of the day: Jack Bauer is Seb Larrson's dad."lets hope he gets 24 goals this season then!
@BenVanDerVelde
I've said it before and I'll say it again - if we want out of this recession, appoint Martin O'Neill Chancellor immediately.
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - SWANSEA 1-2 (0-0)
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! West Brom 1-0 Swansea: Baggies enjoy a change in FORTUNE
@MirrorFootball
GOAL West Brom 1-1 Swansea - Sigurdsson. Now that IS a change of fortune!
@swansnews
22 of Swansea's 26 goals have been scored by Englishmen, only Manchester United can better that
WIGAN - EVERTON 1-1 (0-0)
@MirrorFootball
SUB: Everton's new striker has come on. Fans are apparently singing 'Follow the Jelavic Road' #quality
@LittleChimpy
Is Victor Chinedu Anichebe becoming the new Ole Gunnar Solskjær? #impact #20LEGEND
MANCHESTER CITY - FULHAM 3-0 (2-0)
@KaiWayne
Chris Baird has now given away a penalty & scored an own goal. All he needs now is to find out his wife is having a coffee with John Terry.
@IgnorantLuke
Man City need to get a striker called Hyde. So they can have Dzeko and Hyde
NEWCATSLE UTD - ASTON VILLA 2-1 (1-1)
@DavidKifford
Gabriel Obertan acting as interpreter for Cisse. Finally found a regular position for him at #NUFC.
@Balaurderaa
Papiss Cisse who has one funny syllable in his name makes his debut for Newcastle #bpl #nufc #avfc
@ianmurphy89
Forget the goal, how hasn't Warnock been sent off?! That's what happens when you watch Hutton too much in training #avfc #nufc
@soccer_dude91
Maybe if Fernando Torres changes his first name to Demba he'll start scoring goals again #NUFC #CFC
@cristoff19
I'm 28,with no right knee and a few extra lbs,but watching Gabriel Obertan 'play' football keeps my dreams of a football career alive.#NUFC
CHELSEA - MANCHESTER UTD 3-3 (1-0)
@blazerunner
The MUFC defence opens to give Torres a clear sight of goal... but he doesn't fall for it and shoots at the corner flag instead.
@SALMAN_1562
Has anybody else noticed how @waynerooney gone from loosing his hair to having the best haircut on the pitch? #hairwego #MUFC
@Twiccip
Why on Earth did Wayne Rooney bother spending all that money on a hair transplant to have it cut like he has ? #MUFC @SkySports
@JacquiOatley
Sturridge used Evans then like a snooker player uses a cushion. #MUFC #CFC
@Red_or_Dead_Edd
Excellent PR work by Team Terry...planting a black man next to John for him to hug in celebration. ;-) #CFC #MUFC
@Ultra_Fox
The Suarez episode obscures fact that Evra past sell-by episode. At fault for all 3 Chelsea goals today #mufc
LIVERPOOL - TOTTENHAM 0-0
@HonestFrank
Cat on the pitch at Anfield. Must have thought it was the Milk Cup. #lfc #thfc
@ianirv
Not much happened at #LFC 23 mins. A cat came on the pitch and #THFC singing "Harry's dog's a millionaire" just about the highlights so far
@BigRedEgg
Lucky it wasn't a black cat on the Klu Klux Klanfield pitch. Suarez would of abused it. #THFC #LFC #MUFC
@eddaball79
Super Harry Redknapp he wears a magic hat, he couldn't fly to Anfield so turned into a cat! #Yiddo #thfc”
@mr_keets
Every Taxi driver in the UK refused to drive Harry Redkanpp to Anfield tonight. They heard he doesn't pay his taxis. #LFC #THFC
Remarkably, the (new) turning point was Blackburn, a multiple European champion, a power-house in recent years, a team that everyone fears! Well, I may be exaggerating a bit... The Gunners really justified the cannon in their logo, scoring seven (three by RPG... I mean the penetrating RVP), being the superior team, but come on! There were only 10 Venky's chickens to fight with. In the 2nd half, that is. I wonder if that French grasshopper will still be glorified after a next week's fixture.
Arsenal will visit the Stadium of Light. Which is unbelievably bright these days. Some say, the Messiah's been around. The others say, the same Messiah made a pact with the devil. Whatever. The point is, Sunderland are brilliant after the Martin O'Neill's appointment. 22 points of a possible 30. They must be doing something right. And the Arsenal match will be a proper test. For both of them: the Tracksuit and the Sleeping-bag.
I should mention the clash between Chelsea and Manchester UTD. Pure drama! Chelski 3-0 up (Juan Mata scored with a beautiful volley), then two penalties - yes, Howard Webb was the referee - for the Red Devils (Wayne Rooney, who now lost his hair at the sides of his head, converted them brilliantly), Chicharito later scored for 3-3. And that's how it finished.
In other 24th round matches Andrew Surman's messing with the fans' bladders, Swans have a serious English fire-power, Manchester City are missing Hyde, Gabriel Obertan, whose teammate Papiss Cisse scored a cracker, is better as interpreter than as footballer, and much more. Liverpool - Tottenham? It was all about a cat, really.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "24th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 24th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
ARSENAL - BLACKBURN 7-1 (3-1)
@ShinobiAFC
Figures, the one decent ref left in the #EPL gets a knock to the head...virtue has no rewards #AFC
@nicogrounds
RVP. When a girl says no... why? He's more penetrative than a Samurai sword #afc
@SamerF89
Bet those people who brought them black bin bags are wearing them over their heads #afc
@Ashfaque_Anees
I'm having chicken biryani for dinner ..venkys chicken biryani slightly black burnt #afc #arsenal
@KWAMMC
I don't respect any team Bendtner can score against. He scored a worldie couple seasons back against....Blackburn. Go figure.
NORWICH CITY - BOLTON 2-0 (0-0)
@CGoreham
I think today was first time I've ever actually touched the match ball at #ncfc when it was booted into stand. A tremendous thrill
@DavidMaidstone
Can't understand the moaners, in 1902 we couldn't even raise 11 shirts and there wasn't a ref. Don't people realise how far we've come #NCFC
@MadMarcT
I swear I wet myself when Andrew Surman scored... That's why the gaffer jumped up so high. I would have drenched him. #NCFC
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - WOLVERHAMPTON 1-2 (1-0)
@FourFourTom
Djibril Cisse has been sent off. Who at QPR thought "yeah, what could possibly go wrong!" when they heard he was available to buy? Hothead.
@OptaJoe
13 - Wolves have now recovered more points from losing positions than any other team in the top flight this season. Grit.
STOKE CITY - SUNDERLAND 0-1 (0-0)
© @NeilTheGeordie
Martin O'Neill has obviously sold his soul to the devil. More Jam than Hartleys. ;) #SAFC #ONeillsOnWheels
@gavalar_5318008
Anyone else think tony pulis is turning into Neil warnock, blaming everything and everything other than himself #delusional #safc #stokecity
@Smudgerjumps
Well done to the lads, 3 good points in very difficult conditions today! Not the snow, Stoke's horrible tactics & playing style #safc
@FourFourTom
22 points from a possible 30 for Martin O'Neill since taking over at Sunderland. Unbelievable record.
@Martin_O_Neill
Marty's fact of the day: Jack Bauer is Seb Larrson's dad."lets hope he gets 24 goals this season then!
@BenVanDerVelde
I've said it before and I'll say it again - if we want out of this recession, appoint Martin O'Neill Chancellor immediately.
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - SWANSEA 1-2 (0-0)
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! West Brom 1-0 Swansea: Baggies enjoy a change in FORTUNE
@MirrorFootball
GOAL West Brom 1-1 Swansea - Sigurdsson. Now that IS a change of fortune!
@swansnews
22 of Swansea's 26 goals have been scored by Englishmen, only Manchester United can better that
WIGAN - EVERTON 1-1 (0-0)
@MirrorFootball
SUB: Everton's new striker has come on. Fans are apparently singing 'Follow the Jelavic Road' #quality
@LittleChimpy
Is Victor Chinedu Anichebe becoming the new Ole Gunnar Solskjær? #impact #20LEGEND
MANCHESTER CITY - FULHAM 3-0 (2-0)
@KaiWayne
Chris Baird has now given away a penalty & scored an own goal. All he needs now is to find out his wife is having a coffee with John Terry.
@IgnorantLuke
Man City need to get a striker called Hyde. So they can have Dzeko and Hyde
NEWCATSLE UTD - ASTON VILLA 2-1 (1-1)
@DavidKifford
Gabriel Obertan acting as interpreter for Cisse. Finally found a regular position for him at #NUFC.
@Balaurderaa
Papiss Cisse who has one funny syllable in his name makes his debut for Newcastle #bpl #nufc #avfc
@ianmurphy89
Forget the goal, how hasn't Warnock been sent off?! That's what happens when you watch Hutton too much in training #avfc #nufc
@soccer_dude91
Maybe if Fernando Torres changes his first name to Demba he'll start scoring goals again #NUFC #CFC
@cristoff19
I'm 28,with no right knee and a few extra lbs,but watching Gabriel Obertan 'play' football keeps my dreams of a football career alive.#NUFC
CHELSEA - MANCHESTER UTD 3-3 (1-0)
@blazerunner
The MUFC defence opens to give Torres a clear sight of goal... but he doesn't fall for it and shoots at the corner flag instead.
@SALMAN_1562
Has anybody else noticed how @waynerooney gone from loosing his hair to having the best haircut on the pitch? #hairwego #MUFC
@Twiccip
Why on Earth did Wayne Rooney bother spending all that money on a hair transplant to have it cut like he has ? #MUFC @SkySports
@JacquiOatley
Sturridge used Evans then like a snooker player uses a cushion. #MUFC #CFC
@Red_or_Dead_Edd
Excellent PR work by Team Terry...planting a black man next to John for him to hug in celebration. ;-) #CFC #MUFC
@Ultra_Fox
The Suarez episode obscures fact that Evra past sell-by episode. At fault for all 3 Chelsea goals today #mufc
LIVERPOOL - TOTTENHAM 0-0
@HonestFrank
Cat on the pitch at Anfield. Must have thought it was the Milk Cup. #lfc #thfc
@ianirv
Not much happened at #LFC 23 mins. A cat came on the pitch and #THFC singing "Harry's dog's a millionaire" just about the highlights so far
@BigRedEgg
Lucky it wasn't a black cat on the Klu Klux Klanfield pitch. Suarez would of abused it. #THFC #LFC #MUFC
@eddaball79
Super Harry Redknapp he wears a magic hat, he couldn't fly to Anfield so turned into a cat! #Yiddo #thfc”
@mr_keets
Every Taxi driver in the UK refused to drive Harry Redkanpp to Anfield tonight. They heard he doesn't pay his taxis. #LFC #THFC
2012-02-02
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 23rd ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
Surely you didn't expect that one day Darron Gibson will be fans' favourite. Manchester United's fans that is. But in the 23rd round of EPL THAT happened. Gibson's hasn't been wearing MUFC's shirt for quite a while now... So, how is this possible, you ask.
Well, it's like that. Gibson scored a winner for Everton against Manchester City. Aaah... Here's the catch. Yes, indeed. And by scoring with that thunderous strike of his he made things interesting again. At the top. Both Manchester clubs are now leveled at 54 points.
While City were possibly distracted by a man handcuffing himself to the goal-post, United did their job as expected. Stoke hardly saw the ball, but they could clearly hear the chants glorifying once hated Gibson. Maybe that distracted them... Who would know... David De Gea surely not. He was out as he caught cold or something. How is this possible, you ask. De Gea actually catching something? Strange days, indeed.
Adding to that Andy Carroll scored, and Gabriel Obertan scored, too. Wow, the end is near! In other 23rd matches Swansea turns Chelsea into a bunch of Lee Catermoles, Wigan prefers the league table in alphabetical order, Tchoyi is like schizophrenic racehorse, Leo Messi and Pele were playing in Sunderland, and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "23rd edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 23rd round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
SWANSEA - CHELSEA 1-1 (1-0)
@BeyondthePitch
Seriously find joy in watching Swansea turn highly paid players into Lee Catermole replicas as they get frustrated chasing them for the ball
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! Swansea 1-0 Chelsea - Scott Sinclair scores a 'Worldy' according to Merse. Then again, he that's also how he describes Weatherspoons
@Hastick1
Everyone moans about Torres but who supplies the ball? Mata is forced to the left n Malouda he is as helpful as stevie wonder in the dark
TOTTENHAM - WIGAN 3-1 (2-0)
@FourFourTom
Harry Redknapp has confirmed that Tottenham are set to sign Swiss starlet Taxee Vasion. #THFC
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! Spurs 3-1 Wigan - McArthur scores to keep hopes of another 9-1 alive
@Sir_Scribbles
If Roberto's Wigan gets relegated, it'll be among som of d longest failed battles in history like Napoleon's Waterloo & Scholes' tackling...
@Sir_Scribbles
Sumtimes I think Wigan prefer d League table in alphabetical order...
WOLVERHAMPTON - LIVERPOOL 0-3 (0-0)
@OptaJoke
365 - Andy Carroll has scored to celebrate his last-minute January transfer window move 365 days late. Annual.
@MirrorFootball
Shouldn't be surprised - this is the traditionally one day of the year on which Andy Carroll actually moves
@liam_tomkins
If Suarez can't pick the lock, Carroll will bash the door down. And if he can't do that, Bellamy will race around the back and let us in.
EVERTON - MANCHESTER CITY 1-0 (0-0)
@Dave98FM
#MUFC fans chanting, "There's only one Darren Gibson!" in Old Trafford. Best reception he ever got, to be fair.
@saifpr
I heard a rumour that Sheikh Mansour is sending out an elite SAS squad from Abudhabi to Guinea to kidnapp Kolo&Yaya back to MCFC ASAP.#FGS
@MCFC
What's the strangest thing you've seen at a football match? I'm sure tonight's fan handcuffing himself to a goalpost comes pretty close!
@DTguardian
The pitch invader who handcuffed himself to post at Everton was protesting against Ryanair apparently. #EFC #MCFC
MANCHESTER UTD - STOKE CITY 2-0 (1-0)
@JimMunro
Amos in goal for Man United at Stoke. De Gea phoned in sick.. at the thought of facing Stoke's 6ft 4in battering rams at corners? #mufc
@CraigMays
De Gea not starting because he's sick. How's that possible, he can't catch anything? #MUFC
@NickOatley
De Gea went to hand in a transfer request today...but he dropped it! #Banter #MUFC
@Joe_MU
If Sir Alex ever lines up with Amos Rafael Smalling Evans Ferdinand Anderson Carrick Evra Rooney Scholes. It would spell ARSEFACERS. #MUFC
@Gustavospeaks
Look at Berbatov's new haircut: He was once Andy Garcia, now he has turned into a more Robert De Niro look-a-like. #mufc
@BiggyPert
It took Darron Gibson to leave United to make us happy, then to score against #MCFC to become a HERO!!! #MUFC
ASTON VILLA - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 2-2 (1-2)
@McLeishoutnow
Baa baa #avfcsheep back McLeish Baa baa he is great baa baa keep it up 6 wins out of 23 baa baa local press say all is well @ #avfc baa
@OptaJoe
3 - Djibril Cissé has now scored on his Premier League debut for Liverpool, Sunderland & QPR. Impact.
@henrywinter
Djibril Cisse is back with a bang....cracking finish and even better goal celebration. Back-flips, etc, the full Olga Korbut. #avfc 0 #qpr 1
@OptaJoe
100 - Darren Bent has reached 100 Premier League goals in 226 games, the ninth quickest player (of 21) to do so. Reliable.
BLACKBURN - NEWCASTLE UTD 0-2 (0-1)
@OliPalmer88
Going for a 10 day amnesty on Steve kean/BRFC hate/negativity on Facebook & twitter. Going to be hard with who we have coming up though!!
@DanLowth
Obertan scored. Andy Carroll scored. Darron Gibson scored. The apocalypse is nigh.
@Kalou_21
You have to feel sorry for Blackburn fans, they spend hard earned cash to see their team and Obertan manages to score past them #OhDear
BOLTON - ARSENAL 0-0
@E_Dot_Smash
Wilshere injured again, glad wenger didn't do anything stupid like by some1 in january
@piersmorgan
I'm biting my tongue re #Arsenal - dull 0-0 draw, 7th in table, 17pts behind leaders, 12pts behind Spurs. Speaks for itself.
@Chrisdevlingolf
Sorry to say it, but if Walcott played for Utd, Fergie would have sold him to Arsenal by now.
FULHAM - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-1 (0-0)
@LongShaneLong
The reason nobody can mark THE TCHOYI is because even he doesn't know what he's gonna do next. It's like marking a schizophrenic racehorse.
@LongShaneLong
Just began a magical chorus of 'The Tchoyi's My Shepherd'. It built to a magical crescendo, with Wingie "bussin some gospel soul". Magic
SUNDERLAND - NORWICH CITY 3-0 (2-0)
@jakeyholyoak
God took messi and pele, mixed the 2 to make 1, and he came out with stephane sessegnonnnnn!
@offthepost
Sessegnon #megs! Barca have turned up at the Stadium of Light tonight.
@sam2212
We have joy we have fun, We have Stephane Sessegnon, Midfield class from Benin,That’s why all the Sunderland sing #safc
Well, it's like that. Gibson scored a winner for Everton against Manchester City. Aaah... Here's the catch. Yes, indeed. And by scoring with that thunderous strike of his he made things interesting again. At the top. Both Manchester clubs are now leveled at 54 points.
While City were possibly distracted by a man handcuffing himself to the goal-post, United did their job as expected. Stoke hardly saw the ball, but they could clearly hear the chants glorifying once hated Gibson. Maybe that distracted them... Who would know... David De Gea surely not. He was out as he caught cold or something. How is this possible, you ask. De Gea actually catching something? Strange days, indeed.
Adding to that Andy Carroll scored, and Gabriel Obertan scored, too. Wow, the end is near! In other 23rd matches Swansea turns Chelsea into a bunch of Lee Catermoles, Wigan prefers the league table in alphabetical order, Tchoyi is like schizophrenic racehorse, Leo Messi and Pele were playing in Sunderland, and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "23rd edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 23rd round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
SWANSEA - CHELSEA 1-1 (1-0)
@BeyondthePitch
Seriously find joy in watching Swansea turn highly paid players into Lee Catermole replicas as they get frustrated chasing them for the ball
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! Swansea 1-0 Chelsea - Scott Sinclair scores a 'Worldy' according to Merse. Then again, he that's also how he describes Weatherspoons
@Hastick1
Everyone moans about Torres but who supplies the ball? Mata is forced to the left n Malouda he is as helpful as stevie wonder in the dark
TOTTENHAM - WIGAN 3-1 (2-0)
@FourFourTom
Harry Redknapp has confirmed that Tottenham are set to sign Swiss starlet Taxee Vasion. #THFC
@MirrorFootball
GOAL! Spurs 3-1 Wigan - McArthur scores to keep hopes of another 9-1 alive
@Sir_Scribbles
If Roberto's Wigan gets relegated, it'll be among som of d longest failed battles in history like Napoleon's Waterloo & Scholes' tackling...
@Sir_Scribbles
Sumtimes I think Wigan prefer d League table in alphabetical order...
WOLVERHAMPTON - LIVERPOOL 0-3 (0-0)
@OptaJoke
365 - Andy Carroll has scored to celebrate his last-minute January transfer window move 365 days late. Annual.
@MirrorFootball
Shouldn't be surprised - this is the traditionally one day of the year on which Andy Carroll actually moves
@liam_tomkins
If Suarez can't pick the lock, Carroll will bash the door down. And if he can't do that, Bellamy will race around the back and let us in.
EVERTON - MANCHESTER CITY 1-0 (0-0)
@Dave98FM
#MUFC fans chanting, "There's only one Darren Gibson!" in Old Trafford. Best reception he ever got, to be fair.
@saifpr
I heard a rumour that Sheikh Mansour is sending out an elite SAS squad from Abudhabi to Guinea to kidnapp Kolo&Yaya back to MCFC ASAP.#FGS
@MCFC
What's the strangest thing you've seen at a football match? I'm sure tonight's fan handcuffing himself to a goalpost comes pretty close!
@DTguardian
The pitch invader who handcuffed himself to post at Everton was protesting against Ryanair apparently. #EFC #MCFC
MANCHESTER UTD - STOKE CITY 2-0 (1-0)
@JimMunro
Amos in goal for Man United at Stoke. De Gea phoned in sick.. at the thought of facing Stoke's 6ft 4in battering rams at corners? #mufc
@CraigMays
De Gea not starting because he's sick. How's that possible, he can't catch anything? #MUFC
@NickOatley
De Gea went to hand in a transfer request today...but he dropped it! #Banter #MUFC
@Joe_MU
If Sir Alex ever lines up with Amos Rafael Smalling Evans Ferdinand Anderson Carrick Evra Rooney Scholes. It would spell ARSEFACERS. #MUFC
@Gustavospeaks
Look at Berbatov's new haircut: He was once Andy Garcia, now he has turned into a more Robert De Niro look-a-like. #mufc
@BiggyPert
It took Darron Gibson to leave United to make us happy, then to score against #MCFC to become a HERO!!! #MUFC
ASTON VILLA - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 2-2 (1-2)
@McLeishoutnow
Baa baa #avfcsheep back McLeish Baa baa he is great baa baa keep it up 6 wins out of 23 baa baa local press say all is well @ #avfc baa
@OptaJoe
3 - Djibril Cissé has now scored on his Premier League debut for Liverpool, Sunderland & QPR. Impact.
@henrywinter
Djibril Cisse is back with a bang....cracking finish and even better goal celebration. Back-flips, etc, the full Olga Korbut. #avfc 0 #qpr 1
@OptaJoe
100 - Darren Bent has reached 100 Premier League goals in 226 games, the ninth quickest player (of 21) to do so. Reliable.
BLACKBURN - NEWCASTLE UTD 0-2 (0-1)
@OliPalmer88
Going for a 10 day amnesty on Steve kean/BRFC hate/negativity on Facebook & twitter. Going to be hard with who we have coming up though!!
@DanLowth
Obertan scored. Andy Carroll scored. Darron Gibson scored. The apocalypse is nigh.
@Kalou_21
You have to feel sorry for Blackburn fans, they spend hard earned cash to see their team and Obertan manages to score past them #OhDear
BOLTON - ARSENAL 0-0
@E_Dot_Smash
Wilshere injured again, glad wenger didn't do anything stupid like by some1 in january
@piersmorgan
I'm biting my tongue re #Arsenal - dull 0-0 draw, 7th in table, 17pts behind leaders, 12pts behind Spurs. Speaks for itself.
@Chrisdevlingolf
Sorry to say it, but if Walcott played for Utd, Fergie would have sold him to Arsenal by now.
FULHAM - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-1 (0-0)
@LongShaneLong
The reason nobody can mark THE TCHOYI is because even he doesn't know what he's gonna do next. It's like marking a schizophrenic racehorse.
@LongShaneLong
Just began a magical chorus of 'The Tchoyi's My Shepherd'. It built to a magical crescendo, with Wingie "bussin some gospel soul". Magic
SUNDERLAND - NORWICH CITY 3-0 (2-0)
@jakeyholyoak
God took messi and pele, mixed the 2 to make 1, and he came out with stephane sessegnonnnnn!
@offthepost
Sessegnon #megs! Barca have turned up at the Stadium of Light tonight.
@sam2212
We have joy we have fun, We have Stephane Sessegnon, Midfield class from Benin,That’s why all the Sunderland sing #safc
2012-01-22
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 22nd ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
You know when you start a day pissed off, everything is gray, lifeless, boring, you're going through an everyday routine... And half a day later you come home properly drunk with a smoking hot bird, who shags like a pro (whatever that means) and leaves shortly after sex, saying "You can have me whenever you want! No obligations!" Shortly put: a beast of a day turns into a beauty!
And all that could be put into a description of the Manchester City - Tottenham match. After a dull 1st half, by which even some fans of both teams were made to watch rugby, the 2nd was a cracker! Five goals, 2-0 City up, Jermain Defoe and Gareth Bale scored for 2-2, couple of big chances for both teams, some red-card-ish incidents, and finally a last minute penalty for Mario Balotelli, who scored for a big (but undeserved perhaps?) win. Why always him?
The other Sunday derby was played in London at the Emirates. It wasn't as fun as a "booze-bird-no-obliagtion-sex" thing. But it was a decent encounter, in which even RVP made a fool of himself. But the man of the match for the Red Devils was Andrey Arshavin, who - instead of knocking him out - just watched penetrating Antonio Valencia, like he was a leper or something. Or was it Arsene Wenger who should take the blame? Namely, why on Earth would someone in a tough fight replace an ox with a meerkat?
Also in 22nd round: Fernando Torres is devilish, Blackburn lift their hopes with a modest&good willy (?), Clint Dempsey makes everyone forget about George Washington, Sunderland fans reminds the Toon Army it's quite late (it's a funny one!), Robbie Keane dedicates his goals to... erm... everyone (?), Liverpool are hit with a big blow (no, it has nothing to do with a loss v Bolton), and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "22nd edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 22nd round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
NORWICH - CHELSEA 0-0
OfficialVernonK
CFC please send Torres to the Reebok on loan. You know he'll come back a goal scorer.#Sturridge#Wilshire
ChrisReevo
Credit to #CFC support Vs #NCFC yesterday- "We'd rather have Grant Holt" in response to Torres missing a sitter was class banter.
Tommy__Shaw
The game between #ncfc and #cfc entered PL record books yesterday for not having a single foul recorded in the 1st half! #wearemassive #
mickymaguire
"sweet Caroline" Steve Morison num-ber- five cross the ball and he will score Steve Morison num-ber-five leaves defenders on the floor#ncfc
OptaJoke
666 - Fernando Torres has just missed his 666th attempt on goal for Chelsea. Devilish.
EVERTON - BLACKBURN 1-1 (1-0)
RichardACoyle
No point complaining Kean. Fellaini is like gerraaaard, the rules of the game don't actually apply to him.
BrianSeal
My hope is one day to see Fellaini, Luiz, and Puyol all starting for the same team.
RavWilding
I don't do football, but heard on my tv a player called "Goodwillie" does this mean there is a female tennis player called "nicebottom" ? ..
MikeyDelap
So we've got an upfront partnership of Modeste Goodwillie. That's how good we are... We're humble and boastful all at the same time. #Rovers
FULHAM - NEWCASTLE UTD 5-2 (0-1)
MartinLipton
Jol: 1st 1/2 was Brixton; 2nd a holiday to Barbados. Pardew: No complaints, not good enough #ffc #nufc
gerrypimm
Clint Dempsey - best American ever born. That is all. #ffc
OptaJack
1 - Clint Dempsey has become the first USA player to score a hat-trick in the English Premier League. History.
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - WIGAN 3-1 (2-0)
w12ace
Best moment at#QPR yesterday @Joey7Barton duffing his corner into the side-netting, whilst laughing at his new #hetweetswhathewants song :)
stuartalker
Next weekend is the annual Wigan Athletic winter break. Also known as FA Cup 4th round day! #wafc
STOKE CITY - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-2 (0-1)
deankiely40
THE LAST TIME WBA BEAT STOKE WAS 30 YEARS AGO, IT'S NOW 6 HOURS AGO!
rhiwbafc
Hahaha, looking through all my old pictures, and in one folder I have 58 pictures of Graham Dorrans. Du du du, super Graham Dorrans
SUNDERLAND - SWANSEA 2-0 (1-0)
Skyedog01
Oh look it's 5-2 eleven!! #safc
playersspotted
Stephane Sessegnon, clambering out of a manhole with a copy of Will Self’s ‘The Book Of Dave’ clenched between his teeth.
WOLVERHAMPTON - ASTON VILLA 2-3 (2-1)
FourFourTom
Robbie Keane has scored his first goal for his boyhood club Aston Villa. It's just a shame it's against Wolves, his boyhood club.
OptaJoe
7 - Robbie Keane has become only the seventh player to score in the Premier League for six different clubs. Supporter.
OptaJoke
26 - Robbie Keane has dedicated his brace of goals today to his 26 boyhood clubs. Inevitable.
BOLTON - LIVERPOOL 3-1 (2-1)
MikelArteta08
Love this stat: Stewart Downing has more arrests than assists this season. #LFC #YNWA #mufc #efc
IanDoyleSport
Liverpool have now made Blackburn, Bolton and Wigan look good inside a month. That is some going. #lfc #brfc #bwfc #wafc
RedsGoMarchin
gave my brain a good soak in vodka today as a way of diluting/cleansing my memories of the game last night. Feel much better #LFC *hiccup*
FrankLampardUK
Big blow for #LFC. Andy Carroll won't be able to take part in the African Cup of Nations because he isn't African.
kLFCreds
If I'm King Kenny, I'm handing Craig Bellamy a Golf club and locking the team in a room. Whatever happens after that is not my problem.
MANCHESTER CITY - TOTTENHAM 3-2 (0-0)
markbatham
Kaboul looks like a cross between Laurence Fishburne and that chubby old wrestler, Viscera. #mcfc #thfc
Fat_Tony88
#ChrisColeman reminds me of my dad, can't pronounce anyone's name correctly!! #daSilva #Bolocelli #THFC #MCFC
MikelArteta08
Gareth Bale shouldn't leave his banana skins lying about, then he wouldn't slip over! #THFC
Ballsybanter
Goal! Another superb ball from David Silva, and Julian/Jolean/Julie-ann Lescott bundles it home. #mcfc 2, #thfc 0.
Daniel_C_Roy
I wonder if he had his ears pinned back to reduce aerodynamic drag Gareth Bale could actually break the sound barrier. #thfc #MCFC
RorySmithTimes
Well. Bugger me with a fishfork. Balotelli wins and converts last minute penalty. #mcfc 3-2 #thfc
henrywinter
That's brutal on #thfc. Undeserved. Balotelli could have been sent off, could face FA charge tomo, gets/scores winning pen. Why always him?
ARSENAL - MANCHESTER UTD 1-2 (0-1)
plasticpaddyAK
What's all this with handshakes and cuddling? Bring back Keane and Vieria and some big tackles #MUFC #AFC
TheKman84
I suspect Ryan Giggs will play a huge roll today for the Red Devils. Or maybe he'll just bang a bunch of tramps...whatever... #MUFC
PaulMooreEsq
How will Americans ever "get" football if the studio guest expert for the #afc #mufc match is Piers Morgan?
WiMason
How wrong is it that Walcott can now claim to be an 'ankle braker' with his tricks?! #AFC #MUFC
ToomyLav
"Nani"; Portugese for "When he should shoot,he passes.When he should pass,he shoots.When he should cross,he passes to 1st defender" #MUFC
TextualOffender
Johnny Evans made the same mistake as his mother. Kept his legs open. #mufc
NazimTasadiq
Masterstroke by Wenger. 1-1, got #mufc on ropes. Decide2take best threat off &bring on Arshavin who messes up4 Wellbecks goal. Genius. #afc
And all that could be put into a description of the Manchester City - Tottenham match. After a dull 1st half, by which even some fans of both teams were made to watch rugby, the 2nd was a cracker! Five goals, 2-0 City up, Jermain Defoe and Gareth Bale scored for 2-2, couple of big chances for both teams, some red-card-ish incidents, and finally a last minute penalty for Mario Balotelli, who scored for a big (but undeserved perhaps?) win. Why always him?
The other Sunday derby was played in London at the Emirates. It wasn't as fun as a "booze-bird-no-obliagtion-sex" thing. But it was a decent encounter, in which even RVP made a fool of himself. But the man of the match for the Red Devils was Andrey Arshavin, who - instead of knocking him out - just watched penetrating Antonio Valencia, like he was a leper or something. Or was it Arsene Wenger who should take the blame? Namely, why on Earth would someone in a tough fight replace an ox with a meerkat?
Also in 22nd round: Fernando Torres is devilish, Blackburn lift their hopes with a modest&good willy (?), Clint Dempsey makes everyone forget about George Washington, Sunderland fans reminds the Toon Army it's quite late (it's a funny one!), Robbie Keane dedicates his goals to... erm... everyone (?), Liverpool are hit with a big blow (no, it has nothing to do with a loss v Bolton), and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "22nd edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 22nd round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
NORWICH - CHELSEA 0-0
OfficialVernonK
CFC please send Torres to the Reebok on loan. You know he'll come back a goal scorer.#Sturridge#Wilshire
ChrisReevo
Credit to #CFC support Vs #NCFC yesterday- "We'd rather have Grant Holt" in response to Torres missing a sitter was class banter.
Tommy__Shaw
The game between #ncfc and #cfc entered PL record books yesterday for not having a single foul recorded in the 1st half! #wearemassive #
mickymaguire
"sweet Caroline" Steve Morison num-ber- five cross the ball and he will score Steve Morison num-ber-five leaves defenders on the floor#ncfc
OptaJoke
666 - Fernando Torres has just missed his 666th attempt on goal for Chelsea. Devilish.
EVERTON - BLACKBURN 1-1 (1-0)
RichardACoyle
No point complaining Kean. Fellaini is like gerraaaard, the rules of the game don't actually apply to him.
BrianSeal
My hope is one day to see Fellaini, Luiz, and Puyol all starting for the same team.
RavWilding
I don't do football, but heard on my tv a player called "Goodwillie" does this mean there is a female tennis player called "nicebottom" ? ..
MikeyDelap
So we've got an upfront partnership of Modeste Goodwillie. That's how good we are... We're humble and boastful all at the same time. #Rovers
FULHAM - NEWCASTLE UTD 5-2 (0-1)
MartinLipton
Jol: 1st 1/2 was Brixton; 2nd a holiday to Barbados. Pardew: No complaints, not good enough #ffc #nufc
gerrypimm
Clint Dempsey - best American ever born. That is all. #ffc
OptaJack
1 - Clint Dempsey has become the first USA player to score a hat-trick in the English Premier League. History.
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - WIGAN 3-1 (2-0)
w12ace
Best moment at#QPR yesterday @Joey7Barton duffing his corner into the side-netting, whilst laughing at his new #hetweetswhathewants song :)
stuartalker
Next weekend is the annual Wigan Athletic winter break. Also known as FA Cup 4th round day! #wafc
STOKE CITY - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-2 (0-1)
deankiely40
THE LAST TIME WBA BEAT STOKE WAS 30 YEARS AGO, IT'S NOW 6 HOURS AGO!
rhiwbafc
Hahaha, looking through all my old pictures, and in one folder I have 58 pictures of Graham Dorrans. Du du du, super Graham Dorrans
SUNDERLAND - SWANSEA 2-0 (1-0)
Skyedog01
Oh look it's 5-2 eleven!! #safc
playersspotted
Stephane Sessegnon, clambering out of a manhole with a copy of Will Self’s ‘The Book Of Dave’ clenched between his teeth.
WOLVERHAMPTON - ASTON VILLA 2-3 (2-1)
FourFourTom
Robbie Keane has scored his first goal for his boyhood club Aston Villa. It's just a shame it's against Wolves, his boyhood club.
OptaJoe
7 - Robbie Keane has become only the seventh player to score in the Premier League for six different clubs. Supporter.
OptaJoke
26 - Robbie Keane has dedicated his brace of goals today to his 26 boyhood clubs. Inevitable.
BOLTON - LIVERPOOL 3-1 (2-1)
MikelArteta08
Love this stat: Stewart Downing has more arrests than assists this season. #LFC #YNWA #mufc #efc
IanDoyleSport
Liverpool have now made Blackburn, Bolton and Wigan look good inside a month. That is some going. #lfc #brfc #bwfc #wafc
RedsGoMarchin
gave my brain a good soak in vodka today as a way of diluting/cleansing my memories of the game last night. Feel much better #LFC *hiccup*
FrankLampardUK
Big blow for #LFC. Andy Carroll won't be able to take part in the African Cup of Nations because he isn't African.
kLFCreds
If I'm King Kenny, I'm handing Craig Bellamy a Golf club and locking the team in a room. Whatever happens after that is not my problem.
MANCHESTER CITY - TOTTENHAM 3-2 (0-0)
markbatham
Kaboul looks like a cross between Laurence Fishburne and that chubby old wrestler, Viscera. #mcfc #thfc
Fat_Tony88
#ChrisColeman reminds me of my dad, can't pronounce anyone's name correctly!! #daSilva #Bolocelli #THFC #MCFC
MikelArteta08
Gareth Bale shouldn't leave his banana skins lying about, then he wouldn't slip over! #THFC
Ballsybanter
Goal! Another superb ball from David Silva, and Julian/Jolean/Julie-ann Lescott bundles it home. #mcfc 2, #thfc 0.
Daniel_C_Roy
I wonder if he had his ears pinned back to reduce aerodynamic drag Gareth Bale could actually break the sound barrier. #thfc #MCFC
RorySmithTimes
Well. Bugger me with a fishfork. Balotelli wins and converts last minute penalty. #mcfc 3-2 #thfc
henrywinter
That's brutal on #thfc. Undeserved. Balotelli could have been sent off, could face FA charge tomo, gets/scores winning pen. Why always him?
ARSENAL - MANCHESTER UTD 1-2 (0-1)
plasticpaddyAK
What's all this with handshakes and cuddling? Bring back Keane and Vieria and some big tackles #MUFC #AFC
TheKman84
I suspect Ryan Giggs will play a huge roll today for the Red Devils. Or maybe he'll just bang a bunch of tramps...whatever... #MUFC
PaulMooreEsq
How will Americans ever "get" football if the studio guest expert for the #afc #mufc match is Piers Morgan?
WiMason
How wrong is it that Walcott can now claim to be an 'ankle braker' with his tricks?! #AFC #MUFC
ToomyLav
"Nani"; Portugese for "When he should shoot,he passes.When he should pass,he shoots.When he should cross,he passes to 1st defender" #MUFC
TextualOffender
Johnny Evans made the same mistake as his mother. Kept his legs open. #mufc
NazimTasadiq
Masterstroke by Wenger. 1-1, got #mufc on ropes. Decide2take best threat off &bring on Arshavin who messes up4 Wellbecks goal. Genius. #afc
2012-01-15
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 21st ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
The black&white comeback of Metzualems... Or something similar (you can put your suggestions in the comments window below). This should be the title summarizing the latest round of the EPL.
Firstly, I have to mention Paul Scholes. The great (not by height) pale (as if there are properly tanned...) ginger, who was once described as the best by headbuttin' hero Zizou, was one of the heroes for Manchester UTD versus Bolton. It's a good thing he was bored in a so called retirement, because it's always nice to see such players continuing their usual job. Yes, I know, he's as rusty as Albanian submarines once showed in a special edition of Top Gear (I don't fancy cars, it's just that I really like cynicism, English humour, and even Jezza), but he scored!
The other old chap, who deserves to be mentioned (although a Juventus flop - no comments allowed!), is a somewhat complete opposite of Scholes. He's tall, he's, well, slightly darker, and he's French. And he plays for Arsenal as he did before flying across the pond to teach Newyorkers how to play FOOTBALL. And to earn a buck or two, for that matter. Anyway, despite he's been "statued" in London, Thierry Henry started on the bench in Swansea. He came on in 63rd when Arse was - where else - behind (2-1). High hopes everywhere (on Twitter at least). The final result was 3-2 for Swansea. Not the impact the sleeping-bag-loving grasshopper had hoped for.
In the other 21st round matches Martin Jol looks like a not very nice guy, Emile Heskey misses again (this time it's all about computer stuff), Nicklas Bendtner shoots some scenes for a new DVD, Andy Carroll's doing a great job decreasing his value, Harry Redknapp finds himself in a cheeky situation (he lets people penetrate too much), WBA resemble a really crappy funeral (no, not every funeral's crappy), the Toon Army wants Blu-Ray, Katie Price inspires Wigan - City match, and much, much more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "21st edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 21st round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
ASTON VILLA - EVERTON 1-1 (0-0)
Victor Gooner
Emile Heskey has joined Twitter. He meant to join Facebook but he missed. #avfc
Mat Kendrick
Darren Bent scores against Everton?.. That proves it, he must be a Liverpool fan and is Anfield-bound surely... #sarcasm
Tweetorrr.
The Lost World is trending. Incidentally, I think that's where the footballs end up after Darron Gibson has done shooting practice. #EFC
BLACKBURN - FULHAM 3-1 (1-0)
MirrorFootball
GOAL! Blackburn 1-0 Fulham - Gamst Pedersen bangs in a free kick for 10-men Rovers. Yakubu almots chokes on his chicken drumstick
dave bairdinho
Jol looks like he is about to go on a mass murdering spree
Jack Boyle
When Martin Jol smiles, we all come a little closer to death.
CHELSEA - SUNDERLAND 1-0 (1-0)
Infostrada Sports
Frank Lampard scored in his 100th different #EPL match for #CFC. Only others to achieve this for a single club were Henry and Shearer #PL
Gingers for Limpar
Loaning out your players so that they can take points off your rivals is a cunning ploy. Unless that player's Bendtner.
Sophie Nicolaou
Bendtner adds another piece of content to his "Master of Misses" DVD. Available in stores soon...
LIVERPOOL - STOKE CITY 0-0
Sahil Bendre
Henry back he scores....Scholes back he scores.....we want Voronin back #LFC
Glenn Ashcroft
Liverpool supporters watch Dambusters on ITV4 now, the amount of times they use the N-word in a "friendly" way is amazing #LFC
Kenny Senior
Few days back tesco wiped millions and millions off their value in minutes Andy Carroll played for 32 mins 2day & done pretty much the same
MANCHESTER UTD - BOLTON 3-0 (1-0)
Tanmay chopde
Danny Welbeck lifting Scholes after his goal, two Manchester lads. Try buying that City! #mufc #mcfc
Infostrada Sports
At 37 years and 59 days old, Paul Scholes becomes the oldest English goalscorer for #MUFC in the #EPL, overtaking Bryan Robson (36-216) #PL
Mathias Asplund
Paul Scholes is such a king. You should be allowed to bring two players on when he comes off substituted. #mufc
Darren Thomas
Wayne bridge to Arsenal so his mrs can be closer to john terry #mufc
TOTTENHAM - WOLVERHAMPTON 1-1 (0-1)
sportingintelligence
Tottenham today became the first Premier League team to have conceded 1,000 PL goals, as our statto wrote in Dec.
Jamie Sanderson
Brilliant. Frimpong almost sent off, almost scored, kicked ball in van der Vaart's face then blew kisses to Spurs fans, in 1-1 draw.
Arsene's Eyes
Has to be asked. If Mr Redknapp can't stop Wolves from penetrating him, how will he cope in prison next month? #PickUpTheSoapHarry #AFC
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - NORWICH CITY 1-2 (0-1)
Greg Soanes
Based on money spent, promotions and fantastic results in the prem, Paul Lambert has to be manager of the year #ncfc
AdamL
3 points. Managed to catch my train home. Going in town tonight. Have 55% battery. Playing temple run. Does life get better? #BUZINGG! #Ncfc
Lucas
The only difference between #wba and a funeral today was theirs free food at a funeral.
NEWCASTLE UTD - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 1-0 (1-0)
joseph prenter
Fancy feyenord to beat newcastle 1-0!!good start #nufc
Jamie Gillen
“@GGooner: How many times is Ray Wilkins going to say " Enjoy the ball " #nufc #qpr” Good job he isn't commentating on the snooker then! :-P
Padawan Porky
Blur said modern life was rubbish - what rot! #QPR v #NUFC in one window, @ronnieo147 v Ding in another... What Sundays were made for!
Hamish Duff
I'd like to hold Rays throat till he was Blu-Ray #nufc
Gooner Tom
This commentary is hilarious. Can you play the Benny Hill theme tune at the end of the match, please. #nufc #qpr
Tim Collins
How big is machedas nose? Surprised it hasn't been sponsored #nufc #qpr
SWANSEA - ARSENAL 3-2 (1-1)
Telegraph Sport
Henry may have a statue, but he's only worth a place on the bench as #AFC take on #SCFC.
James Dodd
Just heard someone on radio say that #AFC fans were singing: 'Today is gonna be the day that we're gonna have to play Djourou.' #brilliant
Jamie Dyos
Being dominated by the welsh like a sheep in a farmhouse. #AFC
Henry Walmsley
Walcott or Dyer, I know who i'd take to the euros, and it isnt the 100m sprinter who got lost on his way to athletics trials and went to AFC
Paul Fischer
It sounds like the name of a French kids' book but I think we need Thierry & The Ox #AFC
Dafydd Pritchard
Record crowd of 20,409 at the Liberty to see Mertesacker do a convincing impression of a drunk giraffe. #scfc #afc
WIGAN - MANCHESTER CITY 0-1 (0-1)
Bert's Neck
It's fancy dress here at Wigan. Thousands of Their fans have come dressed as plastic seats. #MCFC #WAFC
Anton Stanley
Dzeko did well to escape from Alcaraz... #mcfc #wafc
Ryan D
Question to any (Are there any??) #WAFC fans! Have you ever filled that Stadium? And George Michael concerts don't count!
Craig Friedrichsen
This game is opening up like Katie Price's legs! #mcfc #wafc
Michael Vaughan
Ronnie Stam need to be more like Jaap Stam... Retired #WAFC
Firstly, I have to mention Paul Scholes. The great (not by height) pale (as if there are properly tanned...) ginger, who was once described as the best by headbuttin' hero Zizou, was one of the heroes for Manchester UTD versus Bolton. It's a good thing he was bored in a so called retirement, because it's always nice to see such players continuing their usual job. Yes, I know, he's as rusty as Albanian submarines once showed in a special edition of Top Gear (I don't fancy cars, it's just that I really like cynicism, English humour, and even Jezza), but he scored!
The other old chap, who deserves to be mentioned (although a Juventus flop - no comments allowed!), is a somewhat complete opposite of Scholes. He's tall, he's, well, slightly darker, and he's French. And he plays for Arsenal as he did before flying across the pond to teach Newyorkers how to play FOOTBALL. And to earn a buck or two, for that matter. Anyway, despite he's been "statued" in London, Thierry Henry started on the bench in Swansea. He came on in 63rd when Arse was - where else - behind (2-1). High hopes everywhere (on Twitter at least). The final result was 3-2 for Swansea. Not the impact the sleeping-bag-loving grasshopper had hoped for.
In the other 21st round matches Martin Jol looks like a not very nice guy, Emile Heskey misses again (this time it's all about computer stuff), Nicklas Bendtner shoots some scenes for a new DVD, Andy Carroll's doing a great job decreasing his value, Harry Redknapp finds himself in a cheeky situation (he lets people penetrate too much), WBA resemble a really crappy funeral (no, not every funeral's crappy), the Toon Army wants Blu-Ray, Katie Price inspires Wigan - City match, and much, much more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "21st edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 21st round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
ASTON VILLA - EVERTON 1-1 (0-0)
Victor Gooner
Emile Heskey has joined Twitter. He meant to join Facebook but he missed. #avfc
Mat Kendrick
Darren Bent scores against Everton?.. That proves it, he must be a Liverpool fan and is Anfield-bound surely... #sarcasm
Tweetorrr.
The Lost World is trending. Incidentally, I think that's where the footballs end up after Darron Gibson has done shooting practice. #EFC
BLACKBURN - FULHAM 3-1 (1-0)
MirrorFootball
GOAL! Blackburn 1-0 Fulham - Gamst Pedersen bangs in a free kick for 10-men Rovers. Yakubu almots chokes on his chicken drumstick
dave bairdinho
Jol looks like he is about to go on a mass murdering spree
Jack Boyle
When Martin Jol smiles, we all come a little closer to death.
CHELSEA - SUNDERLAND 1-0 (1-0)
Infostrada Sports
Frank Lampard scored in his 100th different #EPL match for #CFC. Only others to achieve this for a single club were Henry and Shearer #PL
Gingers for Limpar
Loaning out your players so that they can take points off your rivals is a cunning ploy. Unless that player's Bendtner.
Sophie Nicolaou
Bendtner adds another piece of content to his "Master of Misses" DVD. Available in stores soon...
LIVERPOOL - STOKE CITY 0-0
Sahil Bendre
Henry back he scores....Scholes back he scores.....we want Voronin back #LFC
Glenn Ashcroft
Liverpool supporters watch Dambusters on ITV4 now, the amount of times they use the N-word in a "friendly" way is amazing #LFC
Kenny Senior
Few days back tesco wiped millions and millions off their value in minutes Andy Carroll played for 32 mins 2day & done pretty much the same
MANCHESTER UTD - BOLTON 3-0 (1-0)
Tanmay chopde
Danny Welbeck lifting Scholes after his goal, two Manchester lads. Try buying that City! #mufc #mcfc
Infostrada Sports
At 37 years and 59 days old, Paul Scholes becomes the oldest English goalscorer for #MUFC in the #EPL, overtaking Bryan Robson (36-216) #PL
Mathias Asplund
Paul Scholes is such a king. You should be allowed to bring two players on when he comes off substituted. #mufc
Darren Thomas
Wayne bridge to Arsenal so his mrs can be closer to john terry #mufc
TOTTENHAM - WOLVERHAMPTON 1-1 (0-1)
sportingintelligence
Tottenham today became the first Premier League team to have conceded 1,000 PL goals, as our statto wrote in Dec.
Jamie Sanderson
Brilliant. Frimpong almost sent off, almost scored, kicked ball in van der Vaart's face then blew kisses to Spurs fans, in 1-1 draw.
Arsene's Eyes
Has to be asked. If Mr Redknapp can't stop Wolves from penetrating him, how will he cope in prison next month? #PickUpTheSoapHarry #AFC
WEST BROMWICH ALBION - NORWICH CITY 1-2 (0-1)
Greg Soanes
Based on money spent, promotions and fantastic results in the prem, Paul Lambert has to be manager of the year #ncfc
AdamL
3 points. Managed to catch my train home. Going in town tonight. Have 55% battery. Playing temple run. Does life get better? #BUZINGG! #Ncfc
Lucas
The only difference between #wba and a funeral today was theirs free food at a funeral.
NEWCASTLE UTD - QUEENS PARK RANGERS 1-0 (1-0)
joseph prenter
Fancy feyenord to beat newcastle 1-0!!good start #nufc
Jamie Gillen
“@GGooner: How many times is Ray Wilkins going to say " Enjoy the ball " #nufc #qpr” Good job he isn't commentating on the snooker then! :-P
Padawan Porky
Blur said modern life was rubbish - what rot! #QPR v #NUFC in one window, @ronnieo147 v Ding in another... What Sundays were made for!
Hamish Duff
I'd like to hold Rays throat till he was Blu-Ray #nufc
Gooner Tom
This commentary is hilarious. Can you play the Benny Hill theme tune at the end of the match, please. #nufc #qpr
Tim Collins
How big is machedas nose? Surprised it hasn't been sponsored #nufc #qpr
SWANSEA - ARSENAL 3-2 (1-1)
Telegraph Sport
Henry may have a statue, but he's only worth a place on the bench as #AFC take on #SCFC.
James Dodd
Just heard someone on radio say that #AFC fans were singing: 'Today is gonna be the day that we're gonna have to play Djourou.' #brilliant
Jamie Dyos
Being dominated by the welsh like a sheep in a farmhouse. #AFC
Henry Walmsley
Walcott or Dyer, I know who i'd take to the euros, and it isnt the 100m sprinter who got lost on his way to athletics trials and went to AFC
Paul Fischer
It sounds like the name of a French kids' book but I think we need Thierry & The Ox #AFC
Dafydd Pritchard
Record crowd of 20,409 at the Liberty to see Mertesacker do a convincing impression of a drunk giraffe. #scfc #afc
WIGAN - MANCHESTER CITY 0-1 (0-1)
Bert's Neck
It's fancy dress here at Wigan. Thousands of Their fans have come dressed as plastic seats. #MCFC #WAFC
Anton Stanley
Dzeko did well to escape from Alcaraz... #mcfc #wafc
Ryan D
Question to any (Are there any??) #WAFC fans! Have you ever filled that Stadium? And George Michael concerts don't count!
Craig Friedrichsen
This game is opening up like Katie Price's legs! #mcfc #wafc
Michael Vaughan
Ronnie Stam need to be more like Jaap Stam... Retired #WAFC
2011-12-17
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 16th ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
One of the games of the Saturday afternoon - at least for us from Slovenia - was the Newcastle - Swansea match. It surely wasn't a beauty, although the hosts were clearly better (but they just couldn't score, hitting posts and bars). They were also lacking imagination in the midfield. Therefore most of the Toon fans "screamed" for Hatem Ben Arfa, but luckily for us Alan Pardew decided to give a chance to a young Slovenian Haris Vuckic in the last ten minutes. Even though it still ended in a goalless draw, it was nice to see him back on the SJP's pitch. And I must say, he was warmly welcomed... on Twitter at least.
Unlike Steve Kean. After Blackburn defeat against WBA he was - once again - given a lot of stick. One of the funniest tweets? Surely you wouldn't think it's related to the great Jim Morrison... Well, great for the Baggies fans. After all, he scored one of the goals.
Those who watched Wigan - Chelsea match had plenty to see. Except for goals. And exciting play. In the first half, that is. But you could spot a woman showing her love for the turkeys, Bieber's dooming effect on Chelsea (and on everyone else for that matter) etc. But, again, Drogba was nowhere to be seen. He really must be turning into some kind of an invisible man...
Match of the weekend? Manchester City - Arsenal! Citizens did their job. Arsenal didn't. How would they, when their manager - or was it a caterpillar? - was comfortable on the bench - in a sleeping bag. Obviously all this warmth influenced his decision-making. Or why would anyone try to save the game with a player as convincing as Russian democracy?
In the other 16th rd matches there was a ballerina-like buffalo, Fergie was in Fulham to exchange one of his defending assets for Michael Jackson statue, Wolves couldn't handle the truth... er, Huth, and Scott Parker should be careful while in London. Also, you can find out why Berba's not been given much playing time.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "16th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 16th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
BLACKBURN - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-2 (0-0)
MirrorFootball
Could Jim Morrison have shown Steve Kean the doors at Blackburn?
Adi_tweeting
Blackburn lost? alright, then Steve Kean is set to get a pay rise.
olivercusack
Got to feel sorry for Steve Kean. Blackburn fans expect miracles, with average players. They're more unrealistic than Spurs fans.
TheFootballBar
Another defeat for Steve Kean and Blackburn. He's been in charge of #brfc a year now, doesn't time fly when you're having fun... #EPL
EVERTON - NORWICH CITY 1-1 (0-1)
MatthewLumby
Everton's lowest attendance ever in the Premier League today of 31,004. In fairness the traffic on the A55 from Pwllheli was bad today. #EFC
DarrenMelling
"@Helen_hsd: I don't even know what to say to that....at least we didn't lose.. #EFC" I do. It was negative bollocks. Fed up with it.
Jerbomf
Swedish TV have said that Grant Holt is like 'a buffalo with the feet of a ballerina' #ncfc #otbc #canaries #yellowarmy
FULHAM - BOLTON 2-0 (2-0)
MirrorFootball
Fergie at Craven Cottage. To scout Fulham before Weds? To run rule over Cahill? Or to replace Jonny Evans with the Michael Jackson statue?
Joel_The_Jol
After that Bryan Ruiz lobbed dink goal, first name BRYAN on the back of his shirt will be permitted.
PhilippeAuclair
Isn't it just a bit odd how Steve Kean is hung, drawn and quartered every weekend, whilst Owen Coyle keeps walking between the raindrops?
NEWCASTLE UTD - SWANSEA 0-0
theflea88
Obertan looks like Earthworm Jim! #nufc #newcastle
Toon_Scarves
You give every fan in the stadium a piece of paper... What did they expect? I #Nufc #paperplanes
angelofthenorf
If I get one more text about the female lineswoman then my boyfriend is getting no tea! #NUFC
tommyelbows
imagine there's no heaven, imagine if gabby obertan could cross the ball...... some say i'm a dreamer #nufc
chrisshipman
Coloccini with ball control that makes him look like the love child of rubber-legs Tino Asprilla and Sideshow Bob. Brilliant stuff #NUFC
WOLVERHAMPTON - STOKE CITY 1-2 (1.0)
MirrorFootball
Wolves can't handle the Huth! Robert equalises after cruel deflection
adamsmozza
You put your left leg in, left leg out in out in out you shake it all about, your do the Crouchy and thats what its all about!!! oooh Peter.
WIGAN - CHELSEA 1-1 (0-0)
MarcRichardsons
#Lampard has done loads to show AVB and #cfc fans what they've been missing.
PrixD_09
I can already see Bieber effect on #cfc I telling you they are doomed after getting a visit by him
chelseadaft
#CFC Well the most exciting part of the game so far was the woman in the crowd with a turkey on her head
ryanmoscow
I'm finding myself wanting #cfc players to get injured but its not because I don't want them playing. I just like the physio. A lot.
ChelseaAnalyst
Yes, Drogba has put on the invisible cloak again. Time for Torres now. Will AVB bring him on? #CFC
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - MANCHESTER UTD 0-2 (0-1)
m0_p4t3l
Why have #mufc got 12 men on the pitch?? No wonder they scored early #cheats
ChiefWaffler
Nani takes corners like I play golf. Can't get the ball off the floor more than four foot! #MUFC
BrandNewDan
1st half observations from #QPR v #MUFC: Jonny Evans has been excellent, Evra's playing like he's pissed, Helguson could play in the NBA.
OneMatchBan
He picked it up on the halfway line, took on a few players and casually finished. Not a description usually attributed to Carrick... #mufc
jasonleibowitz
What midfield problems? When you've got this mystery player wearing Captain Backpass's shirt we're set. #mufc
docsredarmy
I heard a rumour some team was crowned World Champions this morning? Who gives a fiddlers, we've just seen Michael Carrick score. #MUFC
MattChReport
Nani and Valencia definitely look like two different stages of Michael Jackson's plastic surgery journey. #QPR 0-2 #MUFC
Tenacious_BS
Think Berbatov must have been caught peeing in Fergies half time tea or something #MUFC
samuelluckhurst
Loved the 'Giggs is going to Amsterdam' chants. Even in the Europa League #mufc's away support have the last laugh.
ASTON VILLA - LIVERPOOL 0-2 (0-2)
oconnellhugh
Andy Carroll sipping the Red Bull. Must have been a heavy one last night #LFC
1cornishblue
Amazing, Suarez has not broken his ankle. Just fell over again. Soon up & running freely when #lfc back on attack #divingchea
AsifAAhmad
Heskey off. #LFC down to eleven men. Serious impact on game.
apeman383
Of #lfc's mammoth transfer spending in 2011, the best signing was the one that cost them nothing = bellamy
chrismcgarvie
This Swedish feed for the LFC game is mad. It sounds like a language I'm on the verge of understanding, but is just one step too far away.
maston91
Are the goals bigger in Holland? Never known anyone hit the woodwork more regularly than Suarez #lfc
Jamesbennion
Fairly sure that Andy Carroll is a genetically modified Horse. #lfc
TOTTENHAM - SUNDERLAND 1-0 (0-0)
darrenjackson75
Scott Parker is such a joy to watch, I think I might start stalking him during the week #Parker #coys #THFC
benjaminlhp
Pavlyuchenko is only ever good at being awful and proving people wrong. #coys #thfc #bbcfootball
OptaParody
100,000 - Number of spurs fans who were slating Pav who have just tweeted 'Super Pav'. Fickle
jakeyholyoak
Shock wes brown gave the goal away. Big liability, he makes titus bramble look like franz beckenbauer #sloppy
MANCHESTER CITY - ARSENAL 1-0 (0-0)
Bethany_LFC
Apart from his Mam, is there a person alive that can correctly spell Wojciech Szczesny without looking it up first....? #AFC
MrTobySmith
You know its winter when Wenger is wearing his sleeping bag #afc #mcfc
GregorsTweet
Arsene Wenger looks like the very hungry caterpillar in that coat.
baronvonchuck
If I had £400,000,000 I'd be able to beat Arsenal at home as well #coyg #AFC
Arsenes_Eyes
Just watched Mr Nasri celebrating the goal. I tell Mr Frimpong to get ready. He can come on as soon as he's sharpened his studs. #AFC
reddevil100
end to end game. enjoying it. arsenal defence has more holes in it then a prostitutes knickers. #afc #MCFC
dschowls13
Arshavin is about as convincing as Russian democracy. #afc v. #mcfc
moorsey1907
Don't know why Theo Walcott was complaining about being substituted. He is about as much use as a chocolate teapot #AFC
Rohan_no1
Wenger didn't substitute Gervinho because it would've counted as two, one himself and second for his forehead. #AFC #CITY
Unlike Steve Kean. After Blackburn defeat against WBA he was - once again - given a lot of stick. One of the funniest tweets? Surely you wouldn't think it's related to the great Jim Morrison... Well, great for the Baggies fans. After all, he scored one of the goals.
Those who watched Wigan - Chelsea match had plenty to see. Except for goals. And exciting play. In the first half, that is. But you could spot a woman showing her love for the turkeys, Bieber's dooming effect on Chelsea (and on everyone else for that matter) etc. But, again, Drogba was nowhere to be seen. He really must be turning into some kind of an invisible man...
Match of the weekend? Manchester City - Arsenal! Citizens did their job. Arsenal didn't. How would they, when their manager - or was it a caterpillar? - was comfortable on the bench - in a sleeping bag. Obviously all this warmth influenced his decision-making. Or why would anyone try to save the game with a player as convincing as Russian democracy?
In the other 16th rd matches there was a ballerina-like buffalo, Fergie was in Fulham to exchange one of his defending assets for Michael Jackson statue, Wolves couldn't handle the truth... er, Huth, and Scott Parker should be careful while in London. Also, you can find out why Berba's not been given much playing time.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "16th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 16th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
BLACKBURN - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-2 (0-0)
MirrorFootball
Could Jim Morrison have shown Steve Kean the doors at Blackburn?
Adi_tweeting
Blackburn lost? alright, then Steve Kean is set to get a pay rise.
olivercusack
Got to feel sorry for Steve Kean. Blackburn fans expect miracles, with average players. They're more unrealistic than Spurs fans.
TheFootballBar
Another defeat for Steve Kean and Blackburn. He's been in charge of #brfc a year now, doesn't time fly when you're having fun... #EPL
EVERTON - NORWICH CITY 1-1 (0-1)
MatthewLumby
Everton's lowest attendance ever in the Premier League today of 31,004. In fairness the traffic on the A55 from Pwllheli was bad today. #EFC
DarrenMelling
"@Helen_hsd: I don't even know what to say to that....at least we didn't lose.. #EFC" I do. It was negative bollocks. Fed up with it.
Jerbomf
Swedish TV have said that Grant Holt is like 'a buffalo with the feet of a ballerina' #ncfc #otbc #canaries #yellowarmy
FULHAM - BOLTON 2-0 (2-0)
MirrorFootball
Fergie at Craven Cottage. To scout Fulham before Weds? To run rule over Cahill? Or to replace Jonny Evans with the Michael Jackson statue?
Joel_The_Jol
After that Bryan Ruiz lobbed dink goal, first name BRYAN on the back of his shirt will be permitted.
PhilippeAuclair
Isn't it just a bit odd how Steve Kean is hung, drawn and quartered every weekend, whilst Owen Coyle keeps walking between the raindrops?
NEWCASTLE UTD - SWANSEA 0-0
theflea88
Obertan looks like Earthworm Jim! #nufc #newcastle
Toon_Scarves
You give every fan in the stadium a piece of paper... What did they expect? I #Nufc #paperplanes
angelofthenorf
If I get one more text about the female lineswoman then my boyfriend is getting no tea! #NUFC
tommyelbows
imagine there's no heaven, imagine if gabby obertan could cross the ball...... some say i'm a dreamer #nufc
chrisshipman
Coloccini with ball control that makes him look like the love child of rubber-legs Tino Asprilla and Sideshow Bob. Brilliant stuff #NUFC
WOLVERHAMPTON - STOKE CITY 1-2 (1.0)
MirrorFootball
Wolves can't handle the Huth! Robert equalises after cruel deflection
adamsmozza
You put your left leg in, left leg out in out in out you shake it all about, your do the Crouchy and thats what its all about!!! oooh Peter.
WIGAN - CHELSEA 1-1 (0-0)
MarcRichardsons
#Lampard has done loads to show AVB and #cfc fans what they've been missing.
PrixD_09
I can already see Bieber effect on #cfc I telling you they are doomed after getting a visit by him
chelseadaft
#CFC Well the most exciting part of the game so far was the woman in the crowd with a turkey on her head
ryanmoscow
I'm finding myself wanting #cfc players to get injured but its not because I don't want them playing. I just like the physio. A lot.
ChelseaAnalyst
Yes, Drogba has put on the invisible cloak again. Time for Torres now. Will AVB bring him on? #CFC
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - MANCHESTER UTD 0-2 (0-1)
m0_p4t3l
Why have #mufc got 12 men on the pitch?? No wonder they scored early #cheats
ChiefWaffler
Nani takes corners like I play golf. Can't get the ball off the floor more than four foot! #MUFC
BrandNewDan
1st half observations from #QPR v #MUFC: Jonny Evans has been excellent, Evra's playing like he's pissed, Helguson could play in the NBA.
OneMatchBan
He picked it up on the halfway line, took on a few players and casually finished. Not a description usually attributed to Carrick... #mufc
jasonleibowitz
What midfield problems? When you've got this mystery player wearing Captain Backpass's shirt we're set. #mufc
docsredarmy
I heard a rumour some team was crowned World Champions this morning? Who gives a fiddlers, we've just seen Michael Carrick score. #MUFC
MattChReport
Nani and Valencia definitely look like two different stages of Michael Jackson's plastic surgery journey. #QPR 0-2 #MUFC
Tenacious_BS
Think Berbatov must have been caught peeing in Fergies half time tea or something #MUFC
samuelluckhurst
Loved the 'Giggs is going to Amsterdam' chants. Even in the Europa League #mufc's away support have the last laugh.
ASTON VILLA - LIVERPOOL 0-2 (0-2)
oconnellhugh
Andy Carroll sipping the Red Bull. Must have been a heavy one last night #LFC
1cornishblue
Amazing, Suarez has not broken his ankle. Just fell over again. Soon up & running freely when #lfc back on attack #divingchea
AsifAAhmad
Heskey off. #LFC down to eleven men. Serious impact on game.
apeman383
Of #lfc's mammoth transfer spending in 2011, the best signing was the one that cost them nothing = bellamy
chrismcgarvie
This Swedish feed for the LFC game is mad. It sounds like a language I'm on the verge of understanding, but is just one step too far away.
maston91
Are the goals bigger in Holland? Never known anyone hit the woodwork more regularly than Suarez #lfc
Jamesbennion
Fairly sure that Andy Carroll is a genetically modified Horse. #lfc
TOTTENHAM - SUNDERLAND 1-0 (0-0)
darrenjackson75
Scott Parker is such a joy to watch, I think I might start stalking him during the week #Parker #coys #THFC
benjaminlhp
Pavlyuchenko is only ever good at being awful and proving people wrong. #coys #thfc #bbcfootball
OptaParody
100,000 - Number of spurs fans who were slating Pav who have just tweeted 'Super Pav'. Fickle
jakeyholyoak
Shock wes brown gave the goal away. Big liability, he makes titus bramble look like franz beckenbauer #sloppy
MANCHESTER CITY - ARSENAL 1-0 (0-0)
Bethany_LFC
Apart from his Mam, is there a person alive that can correctly spell Wojciech Szczesny without looking it up first....? #AFC
MrTobySmith
You know its winter when Wenger is wearing his sleeping bag #afc #mcfc
GregorsTweet
Arsene Wenger looks like the very hungry caterpillar in that coat.
baronvonchuck
If I had £400,000,000 I'd be able to beat Arsenal at home as well #coyg #AFC
Arsenes_Eyes
Just watched Mr Nasri celebrating the goal. I tell Mr Frimpong to get ready. He can come on as soon as he's sharpened his studs. #AFC
reddevil100
end to end game. enjoying it. arsenal defence has more holes in it then a prostitutes knickers. #afc #MCFC
dschowls13
Arshavin is about as convincing as Russian democracy. #afc v. #mcfc
moorsey1907
Don't know why Theo Walcott was complaining about being substituted. He is about as much use as a chocolate teapot #AFC
Rohan_no1
Wenger didn't substitute Gervinho because it would've counted as two, one himself and second for his forehead. #AFC #CITY
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