I must say Saturday's lunchtime match between Newcastle and Chelsea at St. James' Park (I do not like the other name...) was a very decent opener. Chelsea won, but Geordies were massively unlucky! David Luiz should be red-carded in the opening minutes, Tim Krul was brilliant (even saved Frank Lamaprd's penalty), they had plenty of chances etc. But they like to hit the bar too much. So it's their fault. A bunch of "boozers"!
Blackburn, formerly known as a bunch of losers, have tried everything (except sacking Steve Kean) to restore some of the "old days reputation". They haven't been particularly successful. Until today. Yes, they collected three points (against Swansea that is). And actually their best player was a beast! Just google it. Here are some clues: it's a shaggy Himalayan hoofed mammal found in Tibet and parts of China and is a very surefooted animal.
Aston Villa on the other hand still haven't found what they're looking for. Maybe they really should get rid of Alex McLeish, because my god they're boring to watch! Not that MUFC were THAT exciting in the Injury bowl. Far from it. And it seems Red Devils' tweeps followed them. It was I think the first match so far that even they didn't do their usual job (funny, cynical... tweeting).
In the other mathces Mario Balotelli invented "Shoulder of Mario," QPR and WBA fans also didn't have the best of afternoons obviously, Bolton couldn't win with a player slower than a Christmas mail in the team, Gervinho confuses Arsenal's, MCFC's and Barca's fans, Evertonians scream for a sugar daddy, special agent Steve is laughing and more!
BTW I apologize for publishing the final version so late. I had to write it on a prehistoric computer. I mean, it's as slow as above mentioned Bolton player...
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is the English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "14th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 14th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
NEWCASTLE UTD - CHELSEA 0-3 (0-1)
ImDanChapman
It looks like Shola has swallowed Ben Arfa #nufc
SirCheekss
Pardew is genius, brings on Ameobi cause Luiz will make him look like he's as good as Messi, brilliant marketing move. #NUFC #CFC
MikeEdge
Seen the size of Ameobi!! I'm just glad I'm not watching this one in 3d! #nufc
GeordieGiant
“@FourFourTom: Tim Krul rhymes with God.” #NUFC
NUFC_Ricey_1892
Has Obertan been training at the Wayne Routledge school of crossing? #nufc
jaredstimson
Meireles just realized how awful his haircut looks and is rolling on the ground trying to cover it up. #NUFC
keithy73
OK, it's not a goal but kicking Ashley Cole in the head's not a bad second prize. #nufc
AdamClery
Raul Meireles. Half punk drummer, half smacked up rooster dipped in paint. #nufc
SternJohnIsMint
We might as well have a team full of alcoholics the amount of times they've hit the bar. #NUFC
BLACKBURN - SWANSEA 4-2 (2-1)
Danza09
Yakubu gonna have some massive dinner tonight dinner4-2 maybe
usarsnl
So the way to inspire Yakubu was to sell him to people with unlimited supplies of chicken.
jamesy_105
Just to stop Blackburn winning the prem, Man City will probably sign Yakubu
bartletsjacket
Idiots (pl, noun); the Blackburn fans protesting and chanting for Steve Kean to be sacked after their team have just won 4-2.
MANCHESTER CITY - NORWICH CITY 5-1 (1-0)
BigGrantHolt
Bad news. Mr Paul has come back from Howard Webb's dressing room and he confirm we CANNOT put two goalkeepers on. Damnit. #ncfc
FisolaNYDN
Mario Balotelli, a soccer combination of Ron Artest & Michael Beasley, just scored a funny goal for Man City. The guy is nuts...and Italian
sportingintel
I love Mario Balotelli. The genius of Zola, the swagger of Cantona and an admirable dash of cheek. #mcfc
MCFC
You've heard of the 'Hand of God' - how about the 'Shoulder of Mario'? #MCFC twitpic.com/7nqrpw
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 1-1 (1-0)
Judethecat
It is simply not good enough for us not to win games like that. Don't tell me its 1 point closer to 40 - it should have been 3! #QPR
TalzUK
@Joey7Barton i thout u said u you was moving to qpr to be part of an ambitious team? and your only looking for 40 points?
TOTTENHAM - BOLTON 3-0 (1-0)
TGebski
Bale showing off his Goal kicking boot just now dedicated to Speedo. Nice touch GB #THFC
TheBoltonWaffle
I love Kevin Davies but he's slower than the Christmas mail #bwfc #thfc
TheBoltonWaffle
Any more nutmegs from Modric and he'll be on Masterchef. #bwfc #thfc
AlfieDiff
Spurs have squandered more scoring opportunities than me at university #thfc #coys
_HarryRedknapp
85 minutes gone. Game over and just got a text, Sandra is doing Lasagne for dinner. #THFC
aBRYANT23
THFC just had 5 minutes of 100% possession. Put that in your pipe, Pep!
WIGAN - ARSENAL 0-4 (0-2)
gunnerblog
RVP has more league goals than Lionel Messi in this calendar year. Unlike Messi, he doesn't play for a team that dominates his league.
JJmessiah
Do arsenal only talk about one player? Cos that's all I ever see on my timeline. RVP this RVP that. No, you're not a one man team at all.
DanielNotaro
Any1 see Gervinho kiss the badge after he scored. Means 1 of 3 things: 1) About to sign for City; 2) About to sign for Barca; 3) He loves us
tomEurosport
Gomez dropping very deep and Wigan are basically lining up in a 4-6-0. Luciano Spalletti and Craig Levein look on admiringly.
ASTON VILLA - MANCHESTER UTD 0-1 (0-1)
EmpireOfSoccer
Brad Guzan about to enter the Fray in the Injury Bowl #MUFC v #Villa #usmnt
JoeMcNamara8
Alan Hutton has the vision of a bucket. #avfc v #mufc
YassinMY
Right now it's like #mufc are suffering from erectile dysfunction. Still, we came hard 1st half. Need to 'keep it up' #seewhatIdonethere?
garykenny1984
only heskey would turn around and fasten his laces whilst his team are attacking. you cant buy skill like that. #mufc #avfc
EVERTON - STOKE CITY 0-1 (0-1)
jairusxs
Srsly the stoke players are man handling everton players.. Do smth about it ref -.-
bluealert
Fellaini being manhandled for a whole corner routine somehow doesn't constitute a foul. Jeez. Still #everton utterly impotent.
seewherl
Goodison park has got to be one of the worst grounds to buy food. #soldoutagainin3mins #starving #sortitout #everton
aeroberg
Watching this Everton game makes me realise how wasted Steven Pienaar's career is at the moment
Brainofpea
We don't given frees! We don't get given penalties! Now we don't get given corner kicks! Welcome to the world of an #Everton supporter!
chrismartin_efc
Its hard work bein an everton fan at the moment, pissed off we need a sugar daddy asap!!!!!!!!
DjimiTraore
And the Everton fans sing their favourite and most commonly sung song at Goodison. "Boooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo" #EFC
WOLVERHAMPTON - SUNDERLAND 2-1 (0:0)
FootieBanter1
There's only room for one good dog muncher in this country and his name is Chung Yong Lee. #bwfc #safc #wolves
linejudgeblog
I'm not sure what's worse, Steve Bruce playing no strikers or Eric Black playing Ji. He's hopeless. #SAFC
FutbolFeller
Somewhere on the Island....Special Agent Bruce has a smile on his face.. #SAFC #SMB
nerdword
O'Neill should perform a human sacrifice for good luck before his 1st game next weekend. I nominate Bendtner to take one for the team. #SAFC
tt9m
Martin O' Nooooooooooooooooooo #safc
FULHAM - LIVERPOOL 1-0 (0-0)
briankettle
Put a number 8 on Henderson's back there and you would have sworn it was Steven Gerrard. #lfc
JohnSinnott
Andy Carroll started 7 #epl games; Fernando Torres six; Dimitar Berbatov one. £115m of talent warming #lfc #cfc #mufc benches
devans182
so Saurez swears at Fulham fans, and Dalglish claims he needs more protection....a slap round the face is what he needs. #LFC
GrantWahl
Congrats to Clint Dempsey, whose 37th Premier League goal breaks Brian McBride's record for a US player. (Also beat Liverpool with it.)
Showing posts with label steve kean. Show all posts
Showing posts with label steve kean. Show all posts
2011-11-06
FUNNY (?) TWITTER RECAP OF THE 11th ROUND OF ENGLISH PREMIERLEAGUE
"Twenty-five years in charge... What should I get him? A pack of chewing gum? He surely likes chewing. But wait. It would be too cheap. A hairdryer? Well, I'm a bit worried he would give me one of his then... A bottle of fine highland whisky? Nah, he's red-nosed enough."
The dilemma ruined Wesley Brown's sleep. He didn't want to disappoint his former manager once again. So he asked his current gaffer (also former Red Devil) Steve Bruce for advice. After a couple of hours thinking about the suitable gift, Bruce said to his defender: "Think, Wes, what can you do best?"
Not so young Wesley started doing some more thinking, after a while thanked him and said: "Oooh, it's going to be a real surprise!" Sadly though, hours later no one was really surprised. As he scored an own goal. Oh, yes, he's good at scoring them. But anyway, it was the perfect gift for SAF! And Wesley was happy again.
The other weekend stories were also quite entertaining. Arsenal claim they do not need a Batman's help, Newcastle is in the same class as Barcelona, Juventus and ManCity, Alex McLeish should be the next celebrity face in the Head&Shoulders commercial, Steve Kean really scared Blackburn fans during Halloween, Mario Balotelli joined Luis Suarez in diving team, Benoit Assou-Ekotto looks up to Marge Simpson and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "11th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 11th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
NEWCASTLE UTD - EVERTON 2-1 (2-1)
Chris_Hewitson
Should I be using @Iwantcurlyhair2's #letsgetcarriedaway hashtag, or is Raylor 1 of the most improved players of the last 12 months? #NUFC
F365
Awful defending from Everton. Heitinga doing an impression of the kids from Jurassic Park when told the T-Rex's vision is based on movement.
MarkyC1982
Only four teams in major European leagues are undefeated Barcelona, Manchester City, Juventus and #nufc remarkable achievement #unbeatoon
ARSENAL - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 3-0 (2-0)
MirrorFootball
GOAL! Arsenal 1-0 West Brom: a tenner if you can guess who got the goal...
elomap
Arsenal opponents should carry the banner "Persie..have Mercy"
FOXSoccer
@FOXSoccerTrax: In happier signs, Arsenal fans have a banner up that reads: "WE DON'T NEED BATMAN, WE HAVE ROBIN."
ASTON VILLA - NORWICH CITY 3-2 (1-1)
General_Krulak
Goddamit, I told McLeish to brush the dandruff off his suit before he went on TV. #avfc
OptaParody
1 - Sian Massey the 1 woman who understands the offside rule. Now she just needs to explain it to Darren Bent. Flag
LeonKnight82
Gabby and bent look like problems .. The road runner and the 6 yard sniffer. #MOTD
BLACKBURN - CHELSEA 0-1 (0-0)
Marcotti
Blackburn ban banners at Ewood, so fans hire plane to fly overhead with big "Steve Kean Out" banner.
sickipediabot
Steve Kean was out Scaring Blackburn fans last night. He was dressed as a contract extension.
MrEpicMind
Calling your pen*s Torres, 'cause it never scores.
LIVERPOOL - SWANSEA 0-0
Joe_Lovejoy
Newcastle sell Carroll for £35m and improve dramatically. Liverpool buy him and draw at home to Sunderland, Norwich and Swansea. Comment?
gunnersopinion
What do you get if you cross a ball to Andy Carroll? A goal-kick
chrismufc99
Stewart downing has played most number of minutes 4 #lfc 0 goals + assists, only 151 players have more assists than him this season”
MANCHESTER UTD - SUNDERLAND 1-0 (1-0)
jimw1
One thing we can be sure of, had SAF retired as planned in 2002, they wouldn't have unveiled the Sven Goran Eriksson Stand on Saturday
KaiWayne
KAI SPORTS NEWS: After many years at Old Trafford, Wes Brown finally comes good for United by scoring in his own net for Sunderland.
shahidkamal
You can always rely on Wes Brown and Steve Bruce to give their team 3 points, as they did again yesterday.
skysarahjane
#ManUtd whip round for SirAlex 25 years in charge - Wes Brown chipping in with O.G. Really Wes you shouldn't have, potplant would have done!
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - MANCHESTER CITY 2-3 (1-1)
Vanja_MUFC
Wow Balotelli, it seems like you are Suarez' the biggest rival... in diving.
MrsStephenFry
Oh dear, Stephen's just come home with a box of Mario Balotelli indoor fireworks . . . #whyalwaysme?
viewfromamerica Alex Ferguson
No Taarabt, no problem. Team was magnificent today. #QPR
WOLVERHAMPTON - WIGAN 3-1 (1-1)
dip_1985
Shocking from Wigan. So many times they could have scored but lack of decent finishers cost them massively. Relegated unless Messi signs
gavlar88
Looks like Wigan have been taking tips on finishing from Liverpool
BOLTON - STOKE CITY 5-0 (2-0)
MirrorFootball
4-0 Bolton. Scoresheet looking like one of Rory McIlroy's - full of Eagles
FULHAM - TOTTENHAM 1-3 (0-2)
MostUnfurrowed
As much as I like Gareth Bale, that's a bloody awful celebration. It's like the tumblr of a 15 year old girl. #thfc
mitchpryce
Does Assou-Ekotto use the same hairdresser as Marge Simpson?
fitbathatba
who's this hardworking, unselfish person and what has he done with Adebayor? #BBCfootball #THFC #EPL
TomCStandard
Assou-Ekotto back for 2nd half with football's most pointless combo: short-sleeved shirt and gloves #thfc #ffc
stujeffrey
When you're sat in row Z and the ball hits ya head that's Zamora! #coys #thfc #spurs
The dilemma ruined Wesley Brown's sleep. He didn't want to disappoint his former manager once again. So he asked his current gaffer (also former Red Devil) Steve Bruce for advice. After a couple of hours thinking about the suitable gift, Bruce said to his defender: "Think, Wes, what can you do best?"
Not so young Wesley started doing some more thinking, after a while thanked him and said: "Oooh, it's going to be a real surprise!" Sadly though, hours later no one was really surprised. As he scored an own goal. Oh, yes, he's good at scoring them. But anyway, it was the perfect gift for SAF! And Wesley was happy again.
The other weekend stories were also quite entertaining. Arsenal claim they do not need a Batman's help, Newcastle is in the same class as Barcelona, Juventus and ManCity, Alex McLeish should be the next celebrity face in the Head&Shoulders commercial, Steve Kean really scared Blackburn fans during Halloween, Mario Balotelli joined Luis Suarez in diving team, Benoit Assou-Ekotto looks up to Marge Simpson and more.
Now it's time to explain (again), what this blog is all about. As I wrote the last few times: You won't find any detailed experts' analysis here. You won't find complete scoresheets either. But you'll find a good banter, juicy comments about the game, the clubs, the players, the refs, the goals... Maybe you'll find some useful info/opinion for a football chat in your favourite bar...
Namely, football is a global sport, so is English Premierleague. It is followed by a huge number of a-round-ball-loving enthusiasts, journos, players and managers themselves... I hear football is also more and more popular in the US of soccer... :)
And for all those reasons it's widely commented on Twitter. It is a very well known "fact" that tweeps possess a lot of football knowledge, common sense, cynicism, humour, love/hate relationships... And, yes, even different kinds of stupidity occur...
So, all the ingredients for the tasty soup of football opinion are there.
This is the "11th edition". Here are some of the bits, which should shed some (different) light on the 11th round of EPL. I thank all the tweeps for contributing...
NEWCASTLE UTD - EVERTON 2-1 (2-1)
Chris_Hewitson
Should I be using @Iwantcurlyhair2's #letsgetcarriedaway hashtag, or is Raylor 1 of the most improved players of the last 12 months? #NUFC
F365
Awful defending from Everton. Heitinga doing an impression of the kids from Jurassic Park when told the T-Rex's vision is based on movement.
MarkyC1982
Only four teams in major European leagues are undefeated Barcelona, Manchester City, Juventus and #nufc remarkable achievement #unbeatoon
ARSENAL - WEST BROMWICH ALBION 3-0 (2-0)
MirrorFootball
GOAL! Arsenal 1-0 West Brom: a tenner if you can guess who got the goal...
elomap
Arsenal opponents should carry the banner "Persie..have Mercy"
FOXSoccer
@FOXSoccerTrax: In happier signs, Arsenal fans have a banner up that reads: "WE DON'T NEED BATMAN, WE HAVE ROBIN."
ASTON VILLA - NORWICH CITY 3-2 (1-1)
General_Krulak
Goddamit, I told McLeish to brush the dandruff off his suit before he went on TV. #avfc
OptaParody
1 - Sian Massey the 1 woman who understands the offside rule. Now she just needs to explain it to Darren Bent. Flag
LeonKnight82
Gabby and bent look like problems .. The road runner and the 6 yard sniffer. #MOTD
BLACKBURN - CHELSEA 0-1 (0-0)
Marcotti
Blackburn ban banners at Ewood, so fans hire plane to fly overhead with big "Steve Kean Out" banner.
sickipediabot
Steve Kean was out Scaring Blackburn fans last night. He was dressed as a contract extension.
MrEpicMind
Calling your pen*s Torres, 'cause it never scores.
LIVERPOOL - SWANSEA 0-0
Joe_Lovejoy
Newcastle sell Carroll for £35m and improve dramatically. Liverpool buy him and draw at home to Sunderland, Norwich and Swansea. Comment?
gunnersopinion
What do you get if you cross a ball to Andy Carroll? A goal-kick
chrismufc99
Stewart downing has played most number of minutes 4 #lfc 0 goals + assists, only 151 players have more assists than him this season”
MANCHESTER UTD - SUNDERLAND 1-0 (1-0)
jimw1
One thing we can be sure of, had SAF retired as planned in 2002, they wouldn't have unveiled the Sven Goran Eriksson Stand on Saturday
KaiWayne
KAI SPORTS NEWS: After many years at Old Trafford, Wes Brown finally comes good for United by scoring in his own net for Sunderland.
shahidkamal
You can always rely on Wes Brown and Steve Bruce to give their team 3 points, as they did again yesterday.
skysarahjane
#ManUtd whip round for SirAlex 25 years in charge - Wes Brown chipping in with O.G. Really Wes you shouldn't have, potplant would have done!
QUEENS PARK RANGERS - MANCHESTER CITY 2-3 (1-1)
Vanja_MUFC
Wow Balotelli, it seems like you are Suarez' the biggest rival... in diving.
MrsStephenFry
Oh dear, Stephen's just come home with a box of Mario Balotelli indoor fireworks . . . #whyalwaysme?
viewfromamerica Alex Ferguson
No Taarabt, no problem. Team was magnificent today. #QPR
WOLVERHAMPTON - WIGAN 3-1 (1-1)
dip_1985
Shocking from Wigan. So many times they could have scored but lack of decent finishers cost them massively. Relegated unless Messi signs
gavlar88
Looks like Wigan have been taking tips on finishing from Liverpool
BOLTON - STOKE CITY 5-0 (2-0)
MirrorFootball
4-0 Bolton. Scoresheet looking like one of Rory McIlroy's - full of Eagles
FULHAM - TOTTENHAM 1-3 (0-2)
MostUnfurrowed
As much as I like Gareth Bale, that's a bloody awful celebration. It's like the tumblr of a 15 year old girl. #thfc
mitchpryce
Does Assou-Ekotto use the same hairdresser as Marge Simpson?
fitbathatba
who's this hardworking, unselfish person and what has he done with Adebayor? #BBCfootball #THFC #EPL
TomCStandard
Assou-Ekotto back for 2nd half with football's most pointless combo: short-sleeved shirt and gloves #thfc #ffc
stujeffrey
When you're sat in row Z and the ball hits ya head that's Zamora! #coys #thfc #spurs
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